Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Friday, November 04, 2011

Beware! Take Cover! It's the end of Daylight Saving Time as we know it!


Citizens, beware! Daylight Saving Time as we know it will end this Sunday at 2:00 a.m. local standard time, which (through the dark technology of time travel) shall become 1:00 a.m. local daylight time!

When a time change is actually occurring, take shelter immediately. Put together a kit of emergency supplies. Determine in advance where you will take shelter during time change. (Storm cellars or basements provide the best protection.)

If underground shelter is not available, go into an interior room or hallway on the lowest floor possible. Stay clear of clocks and devices with internal chronometers, such as VCRs and some microwaves. Stay away from windows, doors and outside walls. Go to the center of the room. Stay away from corners because they attract time ripples and temporal distortions.

Parts of Arizona, Utah, Colorado, New Mexico, Wyoming, Idaho and Montana are not affected by the ravages of Daylight Saving Time. Other areas in the U.S. that are spared the horrific effects of Daylight Saving Time are Hawaii, American Samoa, Guam, Puerto Rico, the Virgin Islands.

Final tip: It is NOT Daylight Savings time--there's no "s" after Saving. It's Daylight Saving Time, singular.

PST: Pacific Time
(GMT -08:00)
MST: Mountain Time
(GMT -07:00)
CST: Central Time
(GMT -06:00)
EST: Eastern Time
(GMT -07:00)


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