Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

My Predictions for the Upcoming Presidential Election

 

Eenie-weenie-chili-beanie! These are my predictions for the upcoming presidential election!



...I predict that President Bush and his failed, self-serving policies will continue to be a hindrance to Republican presidential candidates...



...I predict that Republican presidential candidates will continue to try to sell the idea that the government should be run like a business...



...I predict that Republican presidential candidates will continue to tell the American public that cutting taxes for big business will somehow help the economy...



...I predict that Republican presidential candidates will continue to act like illegal immigration is a much larger issue than it really is...



...I predict that Republican presidential candidates will continue to invoke 911 and use fear mongering as part of their campaign of hate...



...I predict that Republican presidential candidates will continue to push the idea that the government will need to get rid of your Social Security retirement savings to balance the federal budget, instead of taxing the wealthy corporations they are beholden to...



...I predict that Republican presidential candidates will continue to sleep through the entire election process, completely oblivious to the American public's needs and desires...



...I predict that despite the will of the American people, the mainstream media will continue to favor the Republican presidential candidates because they are fawning, servile shills for their corporate masters...



...And I predict that I shall continue to hope that the next President of the United States will be a Democrat.
 

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32 Comments:

At Wed Jan 16, 04:59:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Nancy was a cute lil baby wasn't she?

 
At Wed Jan 16, 07:35:00 AM, Blogger pissed off patricia said...

That crystal ball of yours must be a new model because I think it's right on track. Toons are great.

If Huck wins the presidential election I am guessing we are going to be in for a hell that will make the past seven years of hell look rather mild.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 08:29:00 AM, Blogger Jess Wundrun said...

your eenie meanie chili beanie seems to be spot on.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 08:30:00 AM, Blogger Übermilf said...

I torture myself by reading the Chicago Tribune letters to the editor.

Yesterday, someone warned if "that liberal Obama" were elected, we'd have nothing but pennies in our pockets. (ostensibly because of over-taxation, but he didn't say exactly.)

If that prediction came true, I would be a few pennies ahead of where I am now.

Also, does anyone besides me remember how better off most people were under Clinton? And I'm not a Clinton fan.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 09:31:00 AM, Blogger dguzman said...

Ubermilf--that's scary. But as Dr. Z predicted, so many people will continue to believe this bullshit that the repugs have been shovelling for years. "Trickle down" only seems to apply to the shit they trickle down on us. The money never comes.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 10:29:00 AM, Blogger Madam Z said...

Dr. Z, I didn't think anything could cheer me up today, but your skillful photoshopping has pasted a smile on my face, even as I weep for our country.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 11:03:00 AM, Blogger Dean Wormer said...

That Fred Thompson pic is downright creepy. The eyes follow you...

You know there really are no differences between government and business. Take away the fact that one is answerable to the entire populace and the other is answerable to only the shareholders they're exactly the same.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 02:01:00 PM, Blogger Chris said...

I predict that Dr. Zaius' predictions will all come to pass. I also predict that Dr. Zaius' artwork will one day be displayed in museums worldwide.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 02:23:00 PM, Blogger Liberality said...

I predict that another election is about to be stolen.

 
At Wed Jan 16, 04:16:00 PM, Blogger BAC said...

Dr. Z ... this is simply wonderful. Thanks for cheering me up! I've been battling the flu for more than a week now. Ugh.


BAC

 
At Wed Jan 16, 06:45:00 PM, Blogger Distributorcap said...

dr z ----

you make Leonardo da Vinci proud
that was great

 
At Wed Jan 16, 08:55:00 PM, Blogger angry ballerina said...

The awesomeness of that was just...Spell binding....

 
At Wed Jan 16, 09:43:00 PM, Blogger FranIAm said...

That may be the best post I've seen all evening!!!

 
At Wed Jan 16, 11:37:00 PM, Blogger Batocchio said...

Wow! Fine work! Great pictures, and spot-on predictions!

 
At Thu Jan 17, 06:24:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Dr. Monkerstein: You betcha!

Pissed Off Patricia: If Huckabee wins the presidential election then I am guessing that Diebold will have delivered a Satanic miracle.

Jess Wundrun: Don't mess with the Eenie-Weenie-Chili-Beanies! They know their stuff.

Übermilf: I agree! A few pennies in my pocket would a definite improvement on my present condition!

Dguzman: I am afraid that when it comes to the Republicans supply-side economics, something does "trickle down," but it's not money.

Madam Z: So glad that I could copy-and-paste a smile on your face!

Dean Wormer: There is a big difference between government and business. A business can only ruin your country during business hours. Government works 'round the clock.

Chris: Yay! I wanna be in a museum! Thank you, Chris!

Liberality: Sadly, I think that you may be right.

BAC: Jeepers! I hope that you feel better soon.

Distributorcap: Thank you, sir. The Mona Lisa was smiling because of an orangutan, you know. ;o)

Angry Ballerina: Jeepers! Thanks, AG.

FranIAm: Kind words indeed, FranIAm!

Batocchio: Gosh! Thanks, Batocchio. :o)

 
At Thu Jan 17, 07:32:00 AM, Blogger Fade said...

That was great- I hope everyone appreciates all your work in putting this stuff together= everything from the composition of the pics to the commentary is excellent!

 
At Thu Jan 17, 08:28:00 AM, OpenID mwbworld said...

Just remember don't feed them after midnight!

 
At Thu Jan 17, 10:01:00 AM, Blogger Pete Bogs said...

is Nancy running?

 
At Thu Jan 17, 10:23:00 AM, Blogger Swinebread said...

Nice

 
At Thu Jan 17, 12:58:00 PM, Blogger GETkristiLOVE said...

I hate eenie-weenies!

 
At Thu Jan 17, 01:45:00 PM, Blogger The Wizard said...

Wonderful, excellent brilliant! I'm linking ya.

 
At Thu Jan 17, 08:05:00 PM, Blogger DCup said...

Awesome photos and pshopping. Wow.

And yeah, we've gotta have hope. We just gotta.

 
At Thu Jan 17, 11:52:00 PM, Anonymous kg said...

I certainly hope so, but don't discount the Repub's stealing another one. They certainly have had themost practice at that

Kg

 
At Fri Jan 18, 06:03:00 PM, Blogger MichaelBains said...

Doc dude! That was a Really Good post! The ending did to give me teh chills.

Hopefully yours...

err.. um, you know what I mean.

i hope...

{-;

 
At Sat Jan 19, 12:25:00 AM, Blogger Mauigirl said...

Great predictions. And I hope your last one comes true!

 
At Sat Jan 19, 09:19:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Fade: Than you sir. You are very kind.

MWB's World: Heck, no! Jeepers!

Pete Bogs: No, but she is third in line for the presidency. If something were to happen to Bush and Cheney, like an IMPEACHMENT or something...

Swinebread: :o)

GETkristiLOVE: And yet you hang around with that monkey...

The Wizard: Thanky you, sir!

DCup: Hope was all that was left in Pandora's box when the ills of the world were unleashed.

kg: I fear the Republican's stealing another election as well. It might be difficult for them this time, though. The turnout for Democrats has been 2 to 1 for the caucus'!

MichaelBains: I get the chill just thinking about Speaker Pelosi in the White house, too! The RNC and GOP would have an endless hissy fit! It would be great.

Mauigirl: Thank you. I hope that it comes true too!

 
At Sat Jan 19, 04:16:00 PM, Anonymous Agent Orange said...

"Foretellin' the future ain't much of a talent, to be sure"
-Al Capp "L'il Abner"

 
At Sat Jan 19, 04:19:00 PM, Blogger Comrade Kevin said...

Here, here!

 
At Sun Jan 20, 05:38:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Agent Orange: Republicans have become increasingly easy to prognosticate.

Comrade Kevin: Where? Where? ;o)

 
At Sun Jan 20, 07:45:00 PM, Anonymous Agent Orange said...

"Republicans have become increasingly easy to prognosticate."

Now who doesn't admire consistency in political leaders?? ;)

 
At Mon Jan 21, 08:43:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Unfortuantely, many politicians of late are mealy-mouthed and have the consistency of jello pudding.

 
At Sun Jan 27, 07:34:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Crap. Republicans and Democrats are the same thing.

Vote for Ron Paul, or vote for no one.

 

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