Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Evil Spock Presidential Campaign Tainted by Secret European Panda-Love Photo-Shoot

Presidential hopeful Evil Spock in panda porn scandal.

A series of photographs that are potentially damaging to presidential hopeful Evil Spock have surfaced on the internet, and are causing some concern among those in his party. The photographs in question, unearthed by the reporting staff here at Zaius Nation, is from a panda bear fanciers magazine from Eastern Europe.

Washington is buzzing over this recent revelation. The White House is reportedly grateful for a new scandal that does not involve the present administration. 'This may in fact be Evil Spock's 'Macaca Moment,'" according to one Washington insider.

Anyone familiar with his campaign website should know the slogan that seemingly makes a joking reference to stimulating ursine photography, "Your one-stop source for egg-covered transvestite panda pornography!"

Previously the Vulcan politician has been quoted as saying, "There's nothing wrong with panda porn as long as their consenting adults." [ 1 ] Vulcan staff members have attempted to downplay the significance of this quote made earlier in Evil Spock's career, as well as the incorrect usage of the word "their."

"He is a Vulcan. He has difficulty distinguishing between he human concept of possessive pronouns and contractions. The english language is not logical." An Evil Spock representative was quoted as saying. Evil Spock has not been available for comment at this time.

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8 Comments:

At Sun May 20, 11:20:00 AM, Blogger angry ballerina said...

I think I love you Dr!

 
At Sun May 20, 11:32:00 AM, Blogger Evil Spock said...

Someone's been reading the archives.

For the record, Evil Spock has never viewed, filmed, or participated in any sort of panda pornography. But if that's your thing, Evil Spock is fine with it as long as the participants are of age. Evil Spock is always thinking about the rights of cubs and children.

By the way, my boobs look great! Thanks for capturing my best side! I'm glad I decided to shave my legs.

 
At Sun May 20, 11:34:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

The evil one never looked so good.
Have we got a VILF on our hands now?

 
At Sun May 20, 09:02:00 PM, Blogger DCup said...

Panda porn? Big deal. How's he feel about wanton warmaking?

 
At Mon May 21, 02:31:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Angry Ballerina: Let's see Evil Spock worm his presidential campaign out of this! The press is going to have a field day with him.

Evil Spock: You said, "For the record, Evil Spock has never viewed, filmed, or participated in any sort of panda pornography." Then how do you explain this picture? Are you asking us to believe you, or our own "lying eyes?" The scandal is brewing, Evil Spock.

Dr. Monkerstein: Quit VILFing around, Monkerstein! ;o)

DCup: From my reading of his campaign website, I think that Evil Spock is very pragmatic abut these things. He is clearly not above waging war of any kind, including biological warfare.

 
At Mon May 21, 01:01:00 PM, Blogger Ben Varkentine said...

Warn a fella before you post something like that, will ya?

 
At Tue May 22, 06:52:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Sure! Smoke signal? Or courier pigeon?

 
At Tue May 05, 01:21:00 AM, Blogger floreta said...

this image is hilarious!!!
can i put it on my blog for an entry i'm writing? :P

 

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