Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

This just in: Speaker Pelosi's laundry detergent is A-OK with the USA 

This just in: Nancy Pelosi's laundry detergent is A-OK with the USA.

This just in: Despite the fact that the MSM has been telling the American public that they don't like the laundry detergent that Speaker Nancy Pelosi uses, the American public doesn't seem to mind! Mark this down, Glenn Beck and Chris Matthews - Speaker Pelosi's laundry detergent is A-OK with the USA. But thanks for that important update on this non-newsworthy event! Tell us when your crapola gets to the rinse cycle, alright?

And what exactly are the dime-store brillo pads scouring about? They are still trying to come clean about Speaker Pelosi's trip to Syria, and their ridiculously uneven handling of the story. You remember, when the GOP tried to put Speaker Pelosi on Double Secret Probation!

Despite weeks of relentless right-wing attacks, Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s (D-CA) latest approval ratings are virtually unchanged from results taken during the first week of April, a new AP/Ipsos poll shows. Think Progress.

What was that, GOP shills Matt Laur and Tim Russert? What were you saying just a short time ago?

Lauer: But if the Democrats and Speaker Pelosi appear to be acting irresponsibly or incompetently, and let’s face it, a lot of people think she messed up on this one, what’s the impact for Democrats overall?

Russert: It’s considerable. Think Progress.

Wow, that's pretty partisan for an allegedly non-partisan news program, especially when the non-story that you are harping on about is merely a baseless recycled talking point from the Republican Party. Surely CNN can provide some rational discourse on the matter...

CNN’s Suzanne Malveaux: Why should the Americans, or even the international community, see this any more as a political stunt here, a publicity stunt, a big wet kiss to President Al-Assad? Think Progress.

Golly guys, when do you get to the part about the dirty laundry? Those hard to remove stains that you keep scrubbing about? Oh, that's right! You don't! You never had a story in the first place!

This week, American Enterprise Institute fellow Norm Ornstein said of the attacks, "I have yet to see anything with Pelosi that is even semi-tangible evidence of transgression." Brookings Institution scholar Thomas Mann added that Pelosi's progressive leadership has proven to be "more effective and popular" than conservatives expected, so it's "no surprise that she has become a target of attacks and unsubstantiated rumors." Think Progress.

It would seem that if a journalist was really interested in doing some laundry, then their little scrubbing bubbles don't really have far to look to find stories about politicians with some major ring around the collar. Myself, I'm getting a little tired of watching Dick Cheney wash his Haliburton money in the blood of American soldiers.

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4 Comments:

At Wed May 16, 11:52:00 AM, Blogger Angry Ballerina said...

Dick needs to switch to an anti bacterial handsoap. Laced in cyanide. And then he should drink it. All.

 
At Wed May 16, 04:54:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Angry Ballerina: I would happy if President Cheney and Vice-President Bush would just step aside and let a real man be president.

Liberality: Unfortuantely, this is indeed the case.

 
At Wed May 16, 07:20:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kudo's, Dr. Z, on wringing a metaphore out without getting your hands dirty. Nice bit o' wording there!

Tengrain

 
At Sat May 19, 05:31:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Thanks, Tengrain! I actually felt that it got sort of trite by the end. Sorry, I did notice your comment until just now!

 

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