Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Sunday, June 03, 2007

Sleestak Out, Zaius In - In Love That Is! 

Golly gee - When you turn those heaters on! - Woe is me - I must put my cheaters on!
You Snooze - You Lose, Sleestak!

Ha ha! My plan worked! While Sleestak over at Lady, That's My Skull was double timing his girlfriend with Bronze Age Cheryl, I made him believe that I was after Cheryl as well. This added incentive for the filthy reptilian insect to spend more and more time with the emotionally overwrought Cheryl. Little did he suspect that while he was pursuing Cheryl, I managed to steal the heart of his girlfriend, the most wonderful girl in the world, Hayley Mills!

My superior Cash-Fu has overcome Sleestak's "natural charm." (If that's what you want to call it.) I don't mind in the least that Hayley is high spirited or a little bit pschizophrenic - because after our first dance, I was in heaven! Now that we are together, we pass the time away on my yacht and going to Hollywood events. We are very happy together! And as you can see, our future is so bright, we have to wear shades.

Golly gee! When you turn those heaters on,
Woe is me!
Got to get my cheaters on, Jeepers Creepers!
Where'd ya get those peepers? On! Those weepers!
How they hypnotize!
Wher'd ya get those eyes?

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At Sun Jun 03, 04:29:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Mmmmm, Hayley.

At Sun Jun 03, 05:56:00 PM, Anonymous Tengrain said...

Well, you'd love the original The Parent Trap, there're two of her in it!



At Sun Jun 03, 08:00:00 PM, Anonymous Jess Wundrun said...

And a scene where the butt portion of her dress gets cut out (by her-tricky special effects!) which reveals frilly panties beneath. A summer camp minx.

At Sun Jun 03, 08:57:00 PM, Blogger Sleestak said...

You animal!

Hayley Mills does not do the s-e-x.

never has and never will.

At Sun Jun 03, 10:33:00 PM, Anonymous Tengrain said...

Unless my memory fails me, I believe Miss Mills married some man 20+ years her junior (attagirl, Haley!), Bugman, and I have it on good authority that he has thighes like pistons.



At Mon Jun 04, 02:26:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Dr. Monkerstein: Hayley Mills, the most wonderful girl in the world.

Tengrain: Yes, Hayley has the amazing and rather pschizophrenic ability to split into two Hayleys. She is both members of the superhero team the "Hayley Wonder Twins." Admittedly, this adds both positive and negative aspects to our relationship. (Yes, wouldn't you like to know!)

Jess Wundrun: Yes! Hayley Wonder Twin Catfight! Rowr! Saucer of milk for for table 2!

Sleestak: I had been meaning to talk to you about that. I don't understand, Hayley and I will be sitting there talking, and then the camera gets all soft focus and then fade away on the window curtains, and the next thing I know we are in the kitchen and Maureen O'Hara is making us breakfast, and Brian Keith is practicing his putting in the back yard. What the heck is that all about?

Tengrain: You are thinking of Hayley's sister, Juliet Mills, you total perv. ("thighes" like pistons, indeed!)

When Hayley Mills was 20-year-old Mills she met 53-year old director Roy Boulting, 33 years her senior. The two married in 1971, and divorced in 1977. They had one child, Crispian Mills, who became a vocalist and lead guitarist for the band Kula Shaker. During the 1970s, Hayley Mills had a relationship with British actor Leigh Lawson which resulted in a son, Jason Lawson.

And this is the interesting part - Leigh Lawson is now married to... Twiggy!

At Mon Jun 04, 05:18:00 AM, Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

You did it, you really did it! Ahhhhhh! Damn you, damn you all the hellllll!!!!!


Sorry, I'm sure you hear that all the time.

At Mon Jun 04, 01:47:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator: Actually, no - And I love to hear from people that have seen the film, and remember it. I think that you are perhaps the first Intergalactic Gladiator to mosey on over to Ape City. Welcome!


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