Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Don't Just Write To Your Congress Human, Write To All of the Congress Humans!


I am rather upset at this latest turn of events regarding healthcare reform. As much as I enjoy delicious waffles for breakfast, I find that the smell of waffling that is happening on my Mainstream Media Box that is being done by the President and the Democratic members of the senate has put me off my breakfast! (Well, not entirely. I guess I could eat a little toast... And maybe some eggs and a bit of bacon. Is there any orange juice?)

I knew right away that I must do something about this foul set of circumstances, and I also wanted to find a list of which senators were not supporting a public option for healthcare reform so that I might apply some persuasion upon these misguided souls.

Using the mystical internet tubes, I found a website from some fellow named Howard Dean. (He's a doctor, just like me!) I was delighted to find that his website has a complete list of senators and their positions on the important issue of public option for healthcare reform.

This Howard Dean fellow (I just know that I have heard his name somewhere before) says that we should all write to our own personal congress human. He supplies these valuable letter writing tips:

Letter Writing Tips
Write a short note in your own words on why you support a public healthcare option:

* A public healthcare option is crucial to controlling costs, the heart of the healthcare crisis.
* A public healthcare option will keep private insurance honest.

Then ask your Senators these four questions:

* Do you support a public healthcare option as part of reform?

* Do you support a public healthcare option that is ready on day one?

* Do you support a public healthcare option that is national, available everywhere, and accountable to our government?

* Do you support a public healthcare option that has the clout to establish rates with providers and big drug companies?

Conclude by reminding your Senators that you are a constituent, and you expect answers to these questions in writing, via email.

I was delighted to find that my own congress human has already shown support for the public option for healthcare reform. Thus I wrote a brief note to express my feelings towards their decision to show their support on this very important issue:


Thank you for supporting a public option for healthcare reform! :o)

I found that I did not feel that I had done enough to express my feelings on the subject however, and I felt further compelled to speak to all of the Democratic senators that were in that dreaded category of "waffler."

I then compiled a list based on those names listed on Dr. Dean's website, and sent the following missive to each and every name on the list of Democrats that still say "I don't know" or "no" regarding a public option for healthcare reform:

Subject: Don't be a knucklehead mcspazatron, Senator!

Dear Senator,

Why haven't you thrown your full support behind a public option for healthcare reform?

If Barack Obama's healthcare plan gets changed to exclude a public option, then it is not really healthcare reform. Get on the ball, Senator! Don't be a knucklehead mcspazatron. Vote your full support for a public option for healthcare reform!

I strongly urge every one of you to write to your own congress human, as well as sending a note to all of those other "wafflers" as well. It's easy to do. Just write up a letter and a page with your contact info, and then copy and paste each item into each of the corresponding boxes of the email-form-thingie that you must fill out on each of senator's websites. (Only three of them had actual email addresses.) We must have a public option for healthcare reform! (I think that I am going to write to the Republicans next...)


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At Tue Aug 18, 01:26:00 PM, Blogger Randal Graves said...

Howard Dean? Like you'd trust a guy that screams all the time?

When vile yokels like Robert Novak croak, it makes me sad that hell is merely a figment of the imagination.

At Tue Aug 18, 04:15:00 PM, Blogger Greendayman said...

Zaius, excellent post as always and I am all over Snowe and Collins regularly. I have a short post on that I would like your opinion on. It has a Rollerball 1975 theme. If you get a chance, check it out and comment. I am still working on my blog presence and would appreciate your feedback. -greendayman

At Tue Aug 18, 06:24:00 PM, Blogger Seeing Eye Chick said...

Another Sponge Bob Fan. He is my hero.

Thanks for the great advice, I think I shall!

At Tue Aug 18, 06:54:00 PM, Blogger Tengrain said...

I am mimicing you (again), my good Ape, after I read this, I made my own post in a similar vein.

Monkey see, money do? (my regrets...)

Oh, I give you credit and a linkback.



At Tue Aug 18, 08:19:00 PM, Blogger sunshine said...

Thank goodness you were still able to eat your breakfast!
Your fur looks so much better when you've eaten your eggs!

What a good ape. Signing your letter to the senator with a happy face. I'm sure he/she appreciates it! I know I would.
((Hugs))~your fur feels nice too.

At Wed Aug 19, 03:30:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Most congress humans are functionally illiterate. That reduces the risk of them becoming informed on any given issue. As long as information and decision making can be kept separate (for the uninitiated that's called democracy), the system works!

At Wed Aug 19, 02:59:00 PM, Blogger BAC said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At Wed Aug 19, 03:00:00 PM, Blogger BAC said...

Dr. Zaius ... I think I love you ...


At Wed Aug 19, 11:07:00 PM, Blogger ZIRGAR said...

I've been keeping after these politician humans for a while now, but thanks anyway.

No comment on Novack, except to say "No comment on Novack". lol

At Wed Aug 19, 11:33:00 PM, Blogger susan said...

I've been on board with the letter writing for a good long while too. Anybody would think I'm a covert Canadian (rather than a real one conducting subversive health care lobbying :-))

I even donated money to the Howard Dean health care alliance thing. Don't tell my boss I used his credit card.

At Thu Aug 20, 08:23:00 AM, Blogger darkblack said...

A human being a doctor? Impossible, Zaius! They have neither the intellect, aptitude or hygeine, and I'm surprised at this sort of seditious codswallop coming from an esteemed ape such as yourself.


At Thu Aug 20, 09:52:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Randal Graves: On the internet, nobody can hear you scream. ;o)

Greendayman: Ack! That's awesome. I love sci-fi politics because they are so real! Obama's healthcare deathpanels would pull the plug on Moonpie!

You can be Jonathon E. I wanna be the corporate guy that was in charge of the liquid computer bank!

Seeing Eye Chick: Yay! Thanks, Seeing Eye Chick. :o)

Tengrain: Yay! Thanks, Tengrain. (Feel free to use my files if you want.) :o)

<IFRAME SRC="" NAME="081809senators" WIDTH="520" HEIGHT="350" FRAMEBORDER="0">vids043091</IFRAME></CENTER></div></DIV><DIV align="center"><div style="width:520px;text-align:center;padding:0px;background-color:#FFFFFF;border:0px solid black;font-size:13px;text-align:center;"><A HREF="" TARGET="081809senators" TITLE=""><I><B>Democrats "I don't Know" or "No"</B></I></A> | <A HREF="" TARGET="081809senators" TITLE=""><I><B>Democrats "Yes"</B></I></A> | <A HREF="" TARGET="081809senators" TITLE=""><I><B>Republicans "No"</B></I></A></div></DIV>

Sunshine: Indeed! Breakfast is almost the most important meal of the day! After dessert, that is. ;o)

Jang-chub Ozer: I would like to help some of them be kept separate. separate cages, that is! ;o)

BAC: Oh, BAC! You know I love you too. ♥ ♥ ♥ :o)

Zirgar: Yay! Keep up the good fight, Zirgar! I have "No comment on Novack", as well. If you can't say something nice...

Susan: Hey! I wanna go to Canada! Do you think that we can use your bosses credit card? ;o)

Darkblack: Ack! I see your seditious codswallop, ands raise you two suffiring sucotashes and a gadzooks. ;o)


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