Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Monday, September 17, 2007

Election News

Two new candidates have officially entered the race:

I, Splotchy
Tony Stark

Dr. Smith and his running mate Marcia Brady have dug up a scandelous video that exposes the sordid and decandent lives of some of the candidates. The images are shocking! You can check it out at this link, but I warn you - this video is not for the faint of heart!

Inexplicably, Dr. Monkerstein's campaign manager Samurai Frog has retired to Mars. I think it's a trick - There is no way that Samurai Frog would ever knowingly go to a planet without women on it unless he wasn't being put up to it.

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At Mon Sep 17, 11:46:00 AM, Blogger Evil Spock said...

This is a crowded field. Evil Spock hopes you tear each other apart so that things are clear in 2012.

At Mon Sep 17, 01:21:00 PM, Anonymous Dr. Smith said...

Evil Spock refers to himself in the third person which is the mark of true super-villiany!

Perhaps we need to join forces against him.

The Frog knows something we don't. Perhaps Mars is a hot bed of gorgeous nymphomaniacs and he's keeping that info to himself!

At Mon Sep 17, 01:32:00 PM, Blogger GETkristiLOVE said...

Maybe Mars is the Iceland of the solar system.

At Mon Sep 17, 01:37:00 PM, Blogger SamuraiFrog said...

Mars is a mellow place, it's true. But it also needs women, and that's where my scientific and business skills will come in handy. What concern is your petty race to me when I have matters of saving a planet on my mind!

Dr. Smith, tell Marcia I said: "Hey. How YOU doin'?"

At Mon Sep 17, 03:44:00 PM, Blogger Jess Wundrun said...

I haven't been able to pick a candidate to back so far. And it has me feeling indecisive and a little sad. Maybe a giant piece of rubble with a pipe in it would be something I could get behind. It is alot cooler than the other candidates in a deconstructive kinda way.

At Mon Sep 17, 04:33:00 PM, Blogger FranIAm said...

I'm with Jess on this one. Its iSplotchy all the way for me.

At Mon Sep 17, 06:40:00 PM, Blogger Distributorcap said...

hey can someone bring those two little rovers home

At Mon Sep 17, 10:29:00 PM, Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

What about when Santa Claus conquered the Martians? What was up with that?

At Mon Sep 17, 11:48:00 PM, Blogger Freida Bee said...

Now, I'm truly conflicted about who I want to vote for and am even more behind the idea of consensus governing.

At Tue Sep 18, 05:52:00 AM, Blogger J.D. said...

There just might be another new candidate by the end of the week...

At Tue Sep 18, 06:24:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Evil Spock: So your plan is to just hope for the best, without any kind of plan? You must be a Republican!

Dr. Smith: I would not worry about Evil Spock, at least not yet. He is so busy tripping over his own feet in the employ of Monkerstein that it would be a shame to halt his self-made spiral to his own demise. and I am sure that Mars might well be a hot bed of nymphomaniacs, but they are all Martian nymphomaniacs. Have you seen what a Martian woman looks like? *shudder* No wonder they have come here to steal our women!

GETkristiLOVE: What do you mean? Do you think that Mars has lots of renewable energy, good government, and eats a lot of fish?

SamuraiFrog: Mars is red. I think that means that it's probably full of commies!

Jess Wundrun: The iSplotchy is certainly a solid candidate, I'll say that!

FranIAm: Hmm... This new candidate is causing quite a stir!

Distributorcap: That would seem to be a question for Samurai Frog at this point.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator: Yeah! I want to know about that too! If Santa hates Martians, then they must be evil-doers!

Freida Bee: Well, the election is still a long way off. There is plenty of time for even further confusion.

At Tue Sep 18, 06:49:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

J.D. Yay! Welcome aboard!

At Tue Sep 18, 09:56:00 AM, Blogger Splotchy said...

For those still undecided, I'll soon lay out the superiority of the iSplotchy in simple terms that even a damned dirty ape (with wicked photoshopping skills, I admit) could understand.

At Tue Sep 18, 03:16:00 PM, Blogger SamuraiFrog said...

No, no, no -- Santa Claus had to conquer an old regime on Mars. That's the problem with Mars; none of its governments has been very stable so far. And Mars isn't full of commies anymore, now the red means we're the planet of love.

PM Frog
Vice President of the United States of Love

At Wed Sep 19, 01:26:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Splotchy: Hmm... big talk from a wad of concrete. Many members of the GOP are almost as smart as you. I'll believe it when I see it...

SamuraiFrog: Uh, red is still color of communist countries and lead painted toys. No wonder Santa is pissed! Pink is the color of the planet of love - or the color of nuclear holocaust, depending on the circumstances.


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