Zaius Nation - Some Apes Are More Equal Than Others

Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Thursday, February 04, 2010

"Sarah Palin: Faith, Family, Freedom - Can She Save America?"

On sale now: "Sarah Palin: Faith, Family, Freedom - Can She Save America?" [ 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ]

22 Comments:

At Thu Feb 04, 08:29:00 AM, Teresita said...: Faith: The virtue of believing in an illogical thing without a shred of evidence. The more illogical the proposition, the more virtuous the faith.

Family: The smallest social unit. And by "family" Sarah means a heterosexual mother married to a heterosexual father, and their children. Single mothers need not apply. Lesbian couples seeking to adopt can just turn their flannel and denim butt right around, by Golly.

Freedom: The liberty to be unmolested by the state as you perform your obligations to God and His annointed representatives on Earth, not the license to do what you want. Two womenfolk wanna get hitched? No can do.
At Thu Feb 04, 08:48:00 AM, Rehctaw said...: YES she can!

As long as the America she saves is Gerry Beckley, Dewey Bunnell, and Dan Peek.

Think of it. She can go to the desert on a horse with no name. Get out of the rain. For there ain't no one for to give you no pain.

with only slight modifications, snow machines would make awesome dune buggies.

But seriously Doc, your Palin fetish underlies a troubling OCD propensity...
At Thu Feb 04, 09:24:00 AM, Darwin's Dagger said...: Holy Crap it's real. I thought it might be one of your clever photoshops at first, but on a second glance it's not that clever.
At Thu Feb 04, 09:34:00 AM, Randal Graves said...: Signs point to no.
At Thu Feb 04, 09:46:00 AM, Anonymous said...: I don't need no savin.

Sarah Palin isn't smart enough to comprehend my current situation or even have a decent conversation with me over coffee--not even if we shot her up with nootropics.
At Thu Feb 04, 09:46:00 AM, aironlater said...: Is it just me or is Sarah Palin the embodiment of a Stepford Wife?
At Thu Feb 04, 09:52:00 AM, Anonymous said...: A hopelessing boring robot that looks good in a skirt while mouthing platitudes about being a traditional woman? Yep technically that could be a fit.

I would like to point out, all this singing in the tune of *MEMEMEMEMEME

by old MooseJuice is really so 1980s.

A Memiore that she buys with a PAC--she spends more on distribution than on campaign contributions with that PAC money, and now a magazine like Oprah's magazine? All that's missing is her portrait by Andy Warhol and a pile of coke somewhere to snort while she goes on and on about *Herself.

What's scary is that she does have some intelligence. She is really good at figuring out how to be slippery.

Using PAC money to ensure literary success even though she cannot seem to make coherent sentences even with a teleprompter.

Now publishing a magazine?

She is slicker than snot in a grease factory that is for sure.
At Thu Feb 04, 11:11:00 AM, Targa said...: The only thing Sarah Palin is interesting in saving is Sarah Palin. It's more like:
Blind Faith
Dysfuncitional Family
Financial Freedom

Her main goal is herself. She blew it when she QUIT the governorship of Alaska.

The headline should read:
Will she quit America?

Yes, all of them. Don'tcha know...
At Thu Feb 04, 12:56:00 PM, Anonymous said...: I continue to believe I've was abducted by aliens and brought to this bizzaro planet as an infant. I cannot comprehend how Sarah negotiates putting on her bra let alone forming a coherent thought on economic policy. Why have I missed your blog for so long? Hundreds of my blogging friends come here!
At Thu Feb 04, 07:40:00 PM, Lockwood said...: I think someone's spelling needs a correction.
At Fri Feb 05, 08:04:00 AM, Anonymous said...: Lockwood--That would be so damn funny--if it weren't true.
At Fri Feb 05, 12:41:00 PM, Farley said...: Can be found between the Enquirer and the Star.
At Fri Feb 05, 03:05:00 PM, Thomas Fummo said...: Eeeugh.

Just...

EEeeuuugh.
At Fri Feb 05, 03:24:00 PM, GETkristiLOVE said...: Well if she can't save America, she can certainly see it from her house.
At Sat Feb 06, 12:27:00 PM, Comrade Kevin said...: I don't want to be saved.
At Sat Feb 06, 01:47:00 PM, Robin Morrison said...: Fascinating new approach to presidential candidacy.
At Tue Feb 09, 03:20:00 PM, Ben Trovato said...: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Sarah Palin
At Wed Feb 10, 08:43:00 PM, Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...: Sarah Palin's a retard.
At Thu Feb 11, 03:55:00 PM, Dr. Zaius said...: Teresita: Well said. It is a mystery to me that you can possibly be a conservative, and yet be able to see so clearly that Sarah Palin is bad for American. Something of a dichotomy. ;o)

Rehctaw: A horse with no name? Only one? I think she expect four of them, with riders... ;o)

Randal Graves: Pesky signs! ;o)

Seeing Eye Chick: She may not be able to save the world, but I thnk that she is helping out her own savings to a large degree! ;o)

Aironlater: I would actually take that as an insult to Stepford Wives! Ah, Katharine Ross and Paula Prentiss...

Seeing Eye Chick: Ack! Sarah Palin is slippery? She is like Ronald Reagan! She's gonna be another teflon president! ;o)

Targa: "The headline should read: Will she quit America?" She already has!

afeatheradrift: Trouble with her bra? I bet she has trouble with shoelaces, too! I've never been to your blog! Awesome! I'll have to add you to my blog roll. ;o)

Lockwood: Ha ! That's awesome! ;o)

Seeing Eye Chick: ;o)

FO: I am guessing that the the Enquirer and the Star actually lend credibility to Sarah Palin's magazine. ;o)

3NINO: I couldn't have said it better myself. ;o)

GETkristiLOVE: She can see Russia from her house! Because of Obama, of course. ;o)

Comrade Kevin: In palin's Amrica, you might not have a choice. ;o)

Kenmeer livermaile: I'm waiting for the comic book. ;o)

Ben Trovato: Mrs. President, we must not allow a mineshaft gap! ;o)

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator: Hee hee! You used the "r" word. ;o)
At Thu Feb 11, 07:25:00 PM, dguzman said...: I find it hard to believe that there's anything "untold... in her own words" about Palin. She talks about nothing BUT herself all the time.
At Thu Feb 11, 10:05:00 PM, Rehctaw said...: A horse with no name? Only one? I think she expect four of them, with riders... ;o)

And as she has consistently displayed, her expectations always come up a few horses short.

Shirley, we have a higher purpose than the shrill shill late of Wasilla.
She's short-shelf life at best. The Paris Hilton of the teabaggin circuit. The Pia Zadora of campaign 2008. The shapely Dan Quayle.

Ain't it about time that we frame the issues that matter?
At Thu Feb 11, 10:38:00 PM, Teresita said...: Dr. Z., google "Libertarian" one of these days. Basically I want the gubmint the hell out of my purse and my bedroom.

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