Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I Want a New Drug


Good afternoon! Dr. Zaius here. Lean back and relax, I am here to devote my full attention to your problems. I know just what's troubling you.

The men and women of your armed forces are locked in a foolish and unwinnable war, The dollar is in the toilet, the government and the media have been lying to you about job growth, Your president is an idiot, et cetera, et cetera...

As a doctor, I am forced to be in the pocket of the big pharmaceutical companies, so you can trust me completely to be impartial when I tell you that what you need is the new drug, Impeachamine!


Caution: Known side effects include the cessation of hostilities in the Middle East, and the speaker of the House becoming the first female President of the United States. It is important to contact your health care provider immediately if your erection lasts longer than 4 hours. contact your congressesional representative immediately.

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15 Comments:

At Wed May 23, 01:53:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Great post but Ray Parker Jr. wants you to change the title of it.

 
At Wed May 23, 03:38:00 PM, Anonymous Jess Wundrun said...

why do I think impeachamine pills work like a de-wormer?

 
At Wed May 23, 07:52:00 PM, Blogger Omnipotent Poobah said...

I think the Decider Guy has overdosed on Assholimine.

 
At Wed May 23, 11:09:00 PM, Anonymous Tengrain said...

I'll take a pallet of it, just throw it in the trunk. I've got work to do.

Regards,

Tengrain

 
At Wed May 23, 11:26:00 PM, Blogger Kelly the dog said...

Love it! I'll take two!

 
At Wed May 23, 11:40:00 PM, Blogger Kelly the dog said...

Have you been misbehaving?

http://kellydog.blogspot.com/2007/05/dr-zaius-on-rampage.html

 
At Thu May 24, 06:05:00 AM, Blogger Morse said...

Oh yes, please.

 
At Thu May 24, 06:15:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Dr. Monkerstein: Thanks! But I think that you mean Huey Lewis And The News, not Ray Parker Jr. I had to read about it to see the conncetion as well!

Jess Wundrun: Yes, but with far more congressional oversite. And less puppies.

Omnipotent Poobah: Yes! What a great idea for another post, Poobah!

Tengrain: Remember, take as directed.

Kelly the dog: I love it! Another sigh of the coming of the Apeocalypse!

 
At Thu May 24, 06:24:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Morse: Oops! Greetings and salutations! I like your blog!

 
At Thu May 24, 09:09:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Actaully I meant what I wrote Doc. Huey wrote "I Want a New Drug" and Ray Parker Jr. said it sounded a lot like his song for "Ghostbusters." They had a little tiff and then things got settled.

 
At Thu May 24, 10:31:00 AM, Blogger angry ballerina said...

I thought I commented on this blog......Hrmmm......

 
At Thu May 24, 02:55:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Dr. Monkerstein: Yes, except you have it backwards. Huey Lewis and the News sued Ray Parker Jr.

"In 1984, Huey Lewis & the News were contacted by the producers of Ghostbusters in regards to developing the theme song for the film. The band decided not to, and Ray Parker Jr. was instead signed to develop the theme. Later that year, the band sued Parker, citing the similarities between the Ghostbusters theme song and their earlier hit "I Want a New Drug". According to Huey Lewis and the News, this was especially damaging to them since the Ghostbusters theme song was so popular, rising to #1 on the charts for three weeks. Parker and Lewis later settled out of court." Wikipedia

Angry Ballerina: "Hmph. I know I left my comment around here somewhere..." Perhaps it it did not save properly? Hmm... Blogger was all screwed up yesterday around noonish, maybe that's it?

 
At Thu May 24, 04:04:00 PM, Blogger angry ballerina said...

Yea maybe. I hope I'm not getting my blogs mixed up again.

 
At Thu May 24, 08:25:00 PM, Blogger genexs said...

I just grind up a couple of tabs of Impeachamine and snort'em! Weeee!

 
At Fri May 25, 07:04:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Angry Ballerina: I hate to think what blog you might have mine confused with...

Genexs: I don't know, congressional house rules dictate that the drug should only be taken as directed. Do you think that's wise?

 

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