Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Zaius Nation Goes From a Complete Unknown to Merely Very Obscure!

Over ONE MILLION customers served! This is indeed a major milestone in Zaius Nation history. Sure, there have been other Zaius Nation milestones in the past [ 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ], but this milestone is even better! (Mainly because it's a bigger number, of course.) Viva la Revolution!

For this very special occasion I have created a video that explains in detail what has taken place here at Zaius Nation over last 3 years. Also, for those that have not been following the news, I have created another video that acts a political primer of recent events. I hope that you like them!

I would like to thank my running mate and partner in crime politics, Germaine Gregarious, for all of her fine work over the years. Her quick wits and pyrotechnic personality have gotten me out of many a scrape, I must say!

Blue Gal
And I would also like to thank Blue Gal, who does so much for all of us bloggers! Thank you, Blue Gal. :o)

And I would like to especially thank all of my readers from the bottom of my heart. (This is the part where I get all mushy. I hope that I didn't forget anybody!) I would like to thank Adventures, Ink, Adventures in Nerdliness, Abagond, AlterDestiny, Anaïs Nohant, Angry Ballerina [ 2 ], The Anti-Bullsh*t Dome of Wonder, Apocalyptics Anonymous II, The Ardent Thread's Weblog, The Aristocrats, Ask A Ninja, All Hat No Cattle, Atomic Romance, Attentive Aphorist, Aunt Dahlia, Baby Days, Bad Habit, Badtux the Snarky Penguin, Bailey's Buddy, Beautiful Day Rule, Beginning to Bird, Betsy Devine, Bella Rossa, Billy Miller, Bleeding Tree, Blog On Smog, Blue Gal, Blue Girl (No relation), Bob Geiger, Bogus Zen*,, Brain Rage, Brainshrub, The Bree Walker Show Blog, Bubs, CalPundit, Candy's daily Dandy, The Canary Sings, Cap'n Dyke, Pirate Queen, Capitol Punishment, Carnival of the Liberals, Cat in the Bag, Chicken Head, Circle Jerk at the Square Dance,, Comics All Too Real, Comrade Kevin's Chrestomathy, The Consortium of Badness, Crooks and Liars, Cuddlefish, Culture of Life News, Culture Vultures, Cyberography, Darkblack, Darwin's Dagger, The Dean's Office, Dear Thyroid, A Drop of Sense, Democratic Underground, Devilham's Attic, The Digital Press Club, Dimensión Fantás, Disaffected and it Feels So Good, DistributorCap NY, Donkey Mountain, DownWithTyranny!, A Dragon Dancing With the Buddha, Driftglass, The Drunken Severed Head, The Dubya's Media, Dusty, El Serracho, Electronic Cerebrectomy, *Eli Lyons, Enriched Geranium, Evangelical Right, Evil Mad Scientist, Evil Slutopia, Evil Spock, Ex-Lion Tamer, Eyeteeth, Fancy Freelancer, Five Public Opinions, 43-Ideas-Per-Minute, 45's and Under, FOX Watch, Fragmentia13, FranIAm, Freida Bee [ 2 ], Gastriques, The Gavel, Germaine Gregarious, Get-Your-Zs, Gledwood Vol 2, GOPnot4me, The Great Endarkenment, The Hapless Hermit, Have Camera Will Travel, Heeling To Port, Here Comes Johnny Yen Again, The Hill, Hotline TV, House of the Rising Sons, I Am Jacks Non-Blog, I Can Has Cheezburger?, Ice Station Tango, Illiterate Electorate, Illustrated Daily Scribble, I, Splotchy, I Make No Promises, Impeachment and Other Dreams, The Inconvienent Truth, Indexed, Infidel753, Informiorium, Jazz from Hell, Jay's Poetry, Jess Wundrun, Jesus' General,, Jintrinsique, Jobsanger, Joe's Bank, Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator, Jon Swift, Just JoeP, Jonestown, Journeys with Jood, Judging the Books, Just An Earth-Bound Misfit, JustJoeP, Kelly the Little Black Dog, Ketchup is a Vegetable, Kimonomomo, Knight and Stars, Kommandos Project, Kulkuri, Kulkuri's Journeys & Wanderings, Leftblogistan, L'ennui mélodieux, La Casa de Los Gatos, Las largas Noches, Laughing Tom Paine, Lady, That's My Skull, Last Left Turn Before Hooterville, Left Edge North, Lesbians From Space, Left 'Toon Lane, Les, The Liberal Coalition, Liberality, Lighter, Like Kryptonite To Stupid, Little Bang Theory (CR), Lisa [ 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ], The Local Crank, Lotsa 'Splainin' 2 Do, Love At Home, Luminiferous Ether, Luxemburger Anarchist, Malheureux, Man-Eating Cheeseburger, Manhattan Butterfly, Maui Girl, Media Matters, Mental Detritus, Mercury Rising, Midnight/Noise, Mind-O-Nicki, Mirror of Fools, Mistress Quickly, Mock, Paper, Scissors, Mocksure, Mondo Marco, MoneyFiles, Monkey Muck, Morning Martini, Mother Jones, Musings of a Wandering Elf, My Two Sense, MWB's World [ 2 ], Myriagon, Nailing Jello to the Wall,, Napman57's Weblog, Neural Gourmet, Neccoland, The Needs of the Few, The Nefarious Lair of LGPPP, Inc., Nine Billion Names and Counting, Nine Pearls, No Smoking in the Skull Cave, A Noble Undoing, Occasional Superheroine, Old American Century, OKJimm's Eggroll Emporium, Omnipotent Poobah, the Opinion Mill, The Otherwhirled, The Oxpecker File, Pam's House Blend, Patriotboy, Perpetual Dawnne [ 2 ], phantsythat, Phydeaux Speaks, Pidomon's Posts*, Pixeloo, PoliTits,, Political Arithmetik, A Post-Cynical Seer, The [Prefix]iest Thing I Saw Today, Preserve, Protect and Defend, Princess Sparkle Pony, Project Matt, Pseudo-Intellectualism, Pushing Fifty...Gently..., The Quaker Agitator, The Quoteable I Ching, Qwerty's Qoncepts, Quit Your Day Job, Rabbits Ate My Homework, *Rabbits, Toyen, and so forth, Rawrahs, Republic of Sestakastan, Read My Mind, Retrospace, Ruby-Mae & Her Mustang Flattery, Rumours With Humour, Sack of Monkeys in My Pocket, Salmon Alley, Sandra Lou, Scholars and Rogues, Secret Fun Blog, Seeing Eye Chick, The Sexy Armpit, Shakespeare's Sister, Shelley the Republican, Sh*t Planet, Silly Humans, Skippy the Bush Kangaroo, Sleestak, Social Zymurgy: Culture Of Beer, Social Seppuku, Some Guy's Blog, Spocko's Brain [ 2 ], spiiderweb, Spin of the Day, Sprawling Ramshackle Compound, Stardragon the Canadian, Stardust Musings, Starship Tim, Stealing Napkins, Steve Denies Any Wrongdoing, The State of Discontent [ 2 ], Stop Licking the Curtains, Stuff White People Do, Stuff You Never Wanted to Know, Stump Lane, The Subliterate Cinephile, A Sunny Thought, Talking Points Memo, They Get Letters, That's Why, They Gave Us a Republic, Thinking Ape Blues, This Is It, This Modern World, Thorne's World, Thought Crime Wave, Threading Water, Through the Wastes of Time, Tiamat's Friends, Traveling Through Time and Space, Two Minutes In The Box, Übermilf, The Unconventional Conventionist, Unglued, Unruly Mob/Les Enrages, Upstate Oddities, Urantian Sojourn, Utah Savage, Vagabond Scholar, A Very Strange Country, Vigouruex Artiste, What I Like About the Universe, What Now Toons, Wee Mousie [ 2 ], Wink Studios, Witches and Scientists, Washington Whispers, Westcoast Walker, What I Would Have Said..., Whiskey Marie, Wondertrash [ 2* ], WOK3, WTF Is It Now?, The Wulfshead, Wyldth1ng, Xena Lynn Amphipoulous, Yikes! [ 2 ], Yooper in Crackerland, Your Dress'd Look Better On Me, Get-Your-Zs, Zen Comix, Zirgar's Fresh New Brain Squeezin's!, and Zoey and Me and Google Images, where I still get about two thirds of my traffic!

Thanks, everybody!

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At Tue Oct 27, 12:04:00 PM, Blogger ZIRGAR said...

Congratulations! Someday I hope to be as famous a blogger and as important an international simian of mystery as yourself!

At Tue Oct 27, 12:38:00 PM, Blogger Seeing Eye Chick said...

You Fucking Rock Dr Zaius!

At Tue Oct 27, 12:39:00 PM, Blogger Some Guy said...

Atta ape, Dr. Zaius! Outstanding!

At Tue Oct 27, 12:44:00 PM, Blogger Darwin's Dagger said...

Plan to undermine the human race and prepare them for the domination of their simian overlords is right on track isn't it Dr. Z. Today a million visits, tomorrow the world!

At Tue Oct 27, 12:51:00 PM, Blogger Ted McLaughlin said...

Congratulations Doc! It must feel great to be "merely very obscure". Maybe someday I can reach that lofty goal myself.

At Tue Oct 27, 12:58:00 PM, Blogger Sue J said...

Congratulations, Dr Z!

I feel honored to have met someone "merely very obscure" in person!

At Tue Oct 27, 01:40:00 PM, Blogger Kelly the little black dog said...

Congrats Dr. Z. Outstanding videos.

At Tue Oct 27, 01:44:00 PM, Blogger Randal Graves said...

No thanks to Beck or El Rushbo? And here I thought you were an upstanding cat. Sniff.

At Tue Oct 27, 01:59:00 PM, Blogger DerkTheJerk said...

Congratulations Dr. Zaius!!! I just love that song in your video.

At Tue Oct 27, 02:30:00 PM, Blogger Devilham said...

You are indeed the shit my friend, keep up the excellent work

At Tue Oct 27, 03:58:00 PM, Blogger Tea Break said...

Well deserved and only the beginning. I only cling to the heels of greatness. I look to the days soon when you will mount media thrones and pontificate from on high to the masses from CNN, Regis, The View and Dr. Oz.

Dare to dream!

At Tue Oct 27, 04:29:00 PM, Blogger sunshine said...

If I had only known you had all those frigging STATS!!!! I wouldn't have been *Blog Stalking* you so much.
Well, you'd probably only be at nine hundred thousand still if it wasn't for me coming in and drooling on your fur.

Congratulations Dr. Zed!!!! I'm so happy for you. You are indeed a worthy read. (and soooo much fun!).
I'm so happy that after quietly stalking you.. I was able to work up the courage to leave a comment. I just think you're awesome! :)


At Tue Oct 27, 04:33:00 PM, Blogger Thomas Funkmonkey said...

Zaius, you magnificent barstool!

Well done! Good show!

HUZZAH! keep fucking that chicken.

At Tue Oct 27, 04:57:00 PM, Blogger FO said...

Awesome! Your blog is great, thanks.

At Tue Oct 27, 07:06:00 PM, Blogger Matty Boy said...

Excellent work, Doctor. 10 K a week is great and a million overall is stunning!

At Tue Oct 27, 08:13:00 PM, Blogger daveawayfromhome said...

A million hits? Wow. May have to change you to the Big Boys catagory on my blog roll now.

At Tue Oct 27, 10:27:00 PM, Blogger ThoughtCriminal said...

Some of the best 46 seconds per day (average) on-line!

At Wed Oct 28, 01:14:00 AM, Blogger Sleestak said...

Brilliant! Many more, big guy!

(What's that song on your retrospective?)

At Wed Oct 28, 07:46:00 AM, Blogger Mistress Quickly said...

Of course I've known you were brilliant for twenty years, but does Sandy still have to work on your car?

At Wed Oct 28, 08:25:00 AM, Blogger Übermilf said...

You are very nearly the McDonald's hamburger of blogging!

Can I have a milkshake? Sorry, "shake."

At Wed Oct 28, 10:32:00 AM, Blogger okjimm said...

Wowsers! But I gotzta ask..... how many of those hits were just surveilance from CIA?

At Wed Oct 28, 02:00:00 PM, Blogger Tengrain said...


Where's the damn cake?



PS - here's to the next million, my good ape!

At Wed Oct 28, 02:19:00 PM, Blogger Darwin's Dagger said...

You should print some t-shirts. They should say "I spent 46 seconds on Zaius Nation and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt."

At Wed Oct 28, 02:19:00 PM, Blogger Tex Betsy said...

Congrats dude! Where's the cake?

At Wed Oct 28, 06:08:00 PM, Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

A hearty congratulations, Doctor.

(And I know I haven't been around much lately... Some idiot decided that getting a masters would be a good idea. I still poke my head in to take a look).

At Wed Oct 28, 06:51:00 PM, Blogger zencomix said...


At Wed Oct 28, 08:36:00 PM, Blogger Joggernauts said...

Congrats on making it past the big milestone. You have an amazing roster of awesomeness and I've added you to my rather newly birthed blog.


At Wed Oct 28, 10:53:00 PM, Blogger darkblack said...

You're ten times the simian that I could ever hope to aspire to, dear Doctor.


At Thu Oct 29, 07:18:00 AM, Blogger Distributorcap said...

so well deserved!

At Thu Oct 29, 07:40:00 PM, Blogger aironlater said...

Congrats Dr. Z!!!!

I know that I have been rather remiss in my commenting duties of late - an unforgiveable thing for which I will surely suffer greatly for.

None-the-less, we are all glad that you are here as you make mine and many others days brighter.

Long be the reign of Zaius!!!

At Thu Oct 29, 08:44:00 PM, Blogger susan said...

and may your counts go to a billion or more next year. Once you get into serious numbers the govimint will bail out your lovely hairy behind :-)

Many congratulations!

At Fri Oct 30, 08:21:00 AM, Blogger JustJoeP said...

Muuuuwhoooooo HaHaaaaaa!!!!


At Fri Oct 30, 10:57:00 AM, Blogger Dr. Zaius said...

Zirgar: Thanks, Zirgar! But I am certainly not important, merely very obscure! ;o)

Seeing Eye Chick: Thanks, Seeing Eye Chick! That's very kind of you. ;o)

Some Guy: Thanks, Some Guy! I have always wanted to be outstanding. ;o)

Darwin's Dagger: That's right! It's all about the public relations. Only 1,970 years until the Reign of Zaius! (You take it very well, I must say.) ;o)

Ted McLaughlin: Thanks, Ted! I'll have you know that I take my obscureness very seriously! ;o)

Sue J: Thanks, Sue J! It was certainly an honor to meet you as well. ;o)

Kelly the little black dog: Yay! I'm so glad that you enjoyed the videos. Thanks, Kelly! ;o)

Randal Graves: You're right. Truly I owe it all to the simpering blathering of a few ignoble individuals. ;o)

DerkTheJerk: Thanks, DerkTheJerk! The song is French, you know. ;o)

Devilham: Thanks, Devilham! I think... ;o)

Tea Break: As far as heels go, I am probably well rounded. Thanks, Tea Break! I can't wait to meet Oprah. Maybe she will give me a car! ;o)

Sunshine: Thanks, Laura! I abosultely loved to be stalked by the likes of you! You are very kind. ♥ :o)

Thomas Funkmonkey: Jeepers! I've always wanted to be a bar stool! Thanks, Thomas Funkmonkey!

FO: Thanks., FO! ;o)

Matty Boy: Thanks, Matty Boy! I think that someone should demand a recount. It's the American way! ;o)

daveawayfromhome: Yay! I can wear my big boy pants now! Thanks, Daveawayfromhome!

ThoughtCriminal: 46 seconds of obscurity a day, but who's counting? Thanks, ThoughtCriminal! ;o)

Sleestak: Thanks, Sleestak! One of my oldest blog pals. By the way, the song is "Ça Plane Pour Moi" as sung by Kim Kay. ;o0

Mistress Quickly: Thanks, Katy! You really know how to hurt a guy. ;o)

Übermilf: Thanks, Übermilf! But I am the McDonald's cheeseburger of blogging, my dear. There's a big difference! ;o)

OKJimm: Ack! I knew somebody was watching me! ;o)

Tengrain: Thanks, Tengrain! As far as the cake is concerned, I am afraid that I have already eaten it. I was famished, as wasting away to nothing! ;o)

Darwin's Dagger: Ha! That's a great idea! And a good line, I will probably steal it. ;o)

Tex Betsy: Thanks, Tex Betsy! I am afraid that I couldn't wait for the guests. The cake had to be eaten right away. It had a pre-existing condition! ;o)

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator: Thanks, Jon! A master's degree! That's great, Jon! I'm a little jealous. ;o)

zencomix: Meow! ;o)

Joggernauts: Thanks, Lex! That's a great looking blog you've got!

Darkblack: That's not true, but it's kind of you to say that. You're stuff is awesome!

Distributorcap: Thanks, DCap! ;o)

Aironlater: I think that I am the king of being remiss in my commenting duties of late, Aironlater. Thanks, Aironlater! ;o)

Susan: Thanks, Susan! I would love a government bailout! With extra cheese, please. ;o)

JustJoeP: Thanks, JustJoeP! ;o)

At Sat Oct 31, 09:02:00 AM, Blogger Freida Bee, MD said...

I'm so happy to see you're still wearing your magic underpants underneath it all. You'll have the votes to be president before long and then the humans won't know what hit 'em.

At Sat Oct 31, 03:01:00 PM, Blogger Mark said...

Congrats, and thanks once again for sparing me for scientific experiments.

At Sun Nov 01, 04:25:00 PM, Blogger Fran Langum / Blue Gal said...

Late to the party AS USUAL. Aren't you nice to make me Mary Poppins! And congratulations on your millionth hit! Woo hoo!

At Fri Jun 18, 06:47:00 AM, Blogger Jay Amabile said...

it's well deserved! and thank you for the mention!


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