Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Sunday, November 30, 2008

The She Creatures singing "Sexy Robot"

 
Straight from Venus (by way of Bristol, UK), I present to you The She Creatures music video, "Sexy Robot". "Infusing 1960s garage-rock riffs & psychedelia from Earth with their own cosmic vibes and kitted out in the sexiest of space girl outfits, The She Creatures have set off on an intergalactic tour to bring their way-out sounds to you!" You can find out more about Haley Comet, Elektra Statik, Princess Slayer and Nancy Raygun on their website, theshecreatures.com and on MySpace.

The She Creatures come from outer space to rock your world!
 

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Creepy Internet Ads

 
I can almost understand why Zombie Elvis would come back from the grave to sell you a new mortgage...

But I'm not really sure that Leonardo Da Vinci should be exhumed to sell you an important medical procedure.
 

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Awesome!

 
 

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The Exciting Thing That Happened to Me On My Big Trip to the Mall on Saturday

 
Jeepers! They serve ice cream!

Am I lucky or what!?!?
 

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Thursday, November 27, 2008

We Have a Lot to be Thankful For This Year...

 
We have a lot to be thankful for this year...

We have a new president...

They ran the village idiot out of town...


 

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Friday, November 21, 2008

My Humble Thanks For This Pair of Bloggeriffic Honors

 

Ack! Utah Savage has awarded me the Marie Antoinette Award! I am overwhelmed and overcome with the sheer kindness of this gesture on the part of my Ms. Savage. Why she picked me, I will never guess! I would to thank her from the bottom of my Reese's-Peanut-Butter-Cup-encrusted pongoid heart.

And to fulfill my important duties regarding this important honor, I would like to give this award to the following bloggers; The Ardent Thread, Jess Wundrun, Karla, Dr. Monkerstein, Some Guy and of course, Übermilf.


Thanks, Utah Savage!




I was also lucky enough to be awarded the Superior Scribbler Award by my esteemed colleague, Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein! The rules of this fine award can be found here. (The rumor that I had to bribe Dr. Monkerstein to get this award are very probably not true - Although I would not like to comment on the matter at this time.)

And in keeping with Dr. Monkerstein's kind gesture, I would thus like to bestow the following bloggers with this prestigous award; BAC, Dean Wormer, Dguzman, Germaine Gregarious, Hapless Tigger and Cap'n Dyke [ 2 ], the Unconventional Conventionist and Utah Savage.


(here is a blogroll sized one.)
 

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Has anyone seen General Ursus?

 
His wife is looking for him.
 

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Project Censored: Top 25 Censored Stories for 2009

 
#1. Over One Million Iraqi Deaths Caused by US Occupation
#2 Security and Prosperity Partnership: Militarized NAFTA
#3 InfraGard: The FBI Deputizes Business
#4 ILEA: Is the US Restarting Dirty Wars in Latin America?
#5 Seizing War Protesters’ Assets
#6 The Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act
#7 Guest Workers Inc.: Fraud and Human Trafficking
#8 Executive Orders Can Be Changed Secretly
#9 Iraq and Afghanistan Vets Testify
#10 APA Complicit in CIA Torture
#11 El Salvador’s Water Privatization and the Global War on Terror
#12 Bush Profiteers Collect Billions From No Child Left Behind
#13 Tracking Billions of Dollars Lost in Iraq
#14 Mainstreaming Nuclear Waste
#15 Worldwide Slavery
#16 Annual Survey on Trade Union Rights
#17 UN’s Empty Declaration of Indigenous Rights
#18 Cruelty and Death in Juvenile Detention Centers
#19 Indigenous Herders and Small Farmers Fight Livestock Extinction
#20 Marijuana Arrests Set New Record
#21 NATO Considers “First Strike” Nuclear Option
#22 CARE Rejects US Food Aid
#23 FDA Complicit in Pushing Pharmaceutical Drugs
#24 Japan Questions 9/11 and the Global War on Terror
#25 Bush’s Real Problem with Eliot Spitzer

 

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Sorry, I Have to Clean Up the Backyard today

 
No time for blogging today! Germaine Gregarious said that I have to clean up the backyard. (Jeepers! I don't know what the big deal is. Everything looks OK to me!) In the meantime you can watch this swell 48 second video of a Japanese wake-up service! It is quite alarming, I am sure that you will agree. Ohayo Gozaimas!
 

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Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Palin Vs. Gregarious: You Decide!

 

Ever since I picked up the newspaper on November 5th and received the heartbreaking news that I had lost the presidential election, I have begun to realize that I shall have to work all the harder to overcome man's inherent bias towards his superiors. This small snag has presented something of a quandary for my campaign.

That point aside, recent newscasts indicate that the next GOP presidential candidate is sure to be Sarah Palin, and that after she sold John McCain's campaign bus on eBay, she became the de facto leader of the Republican party. As it would seem that I shall be running against Sarah Palin in 2012, I thus present the following political comparison of Palin and my own running mate, Germaine Gregarious, so that American voters can decide for themselves.

Sarah Palin claims that she can see Russia and the Former Soviet Republics from her backyard...
Germaine Gregarious has acquired nine of the twelve Soviet nuclear launch codes, and is working on the other three.


Sarah Palin calls herself a "maverick", evoking something of a bovine image for herself...
"She-Va" is among the many nicknames that Germaine Gregarious has aquired, which means "the Destroyer of Worlds"...


Sarah Palin wears lipstick....
Germaine Gregarious wears automatic weapons.


Sarah Palin wears pancake makeup...
Germaine Gregarious wears plastic explosives.


Sarah Palin is afraid of the media...
Germaine Gregarious likes to have the mainstream media over for lunch on a regular basis.


Sarah Palin hunts defenseless animals for fun.
Germaine Gregarious hunts defenseless corporate lobbyists for fun.


Sarah Palin uses her claimed devotion to God to inspire her followers...
Germaine Gregarious inspires an immediate fear of the hereafter in others.


Sarah Palin clings to the past...


Germaine Gregarious represents the future!


 

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Awesome!

 
 

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Post-election Palin Portrayed in Playful Poolside Paparazzi Pix

 
**Feel the magic** [ 1, 2 ]
 

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Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Barackisms: From Obamaphoria to Bamelot

 

Barackisms: From Obamaphoria to Bamelot

OBAMAPHORIA: The postelection rapture that swept over Obama's supporters worldwide.

OBAMANATION: A twist on "abomination," expressed by evangelicals and other conservatives who oppose Obama's stance on abortion, gay marriage and other social issues.

OBAMARAMA: The celebrations around the Jan. 20, 2009, inauguration.

OBAMANOS: A play on "Vamonos," or "Let's go," among Obama fans in Mexico.

OBAMATOPIA: The political paradise that Obama's staunchest supporters hope he'll usher in.

OBAMALUJAH: Exultation shouted by his fans.

OBAMATRONS: The policy wonks who will occupy the West Wing of his White House.

OBAMASCOPE: Media scrutiny of the new leader. (Example: "One hundred days after Barack Obama took office, newspaper editors put the president's economic plan under the Obamascope.")

OBAMANATOR: Hollywood-inspired nickname for the new president – even if he's got what California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger contends are "skinny legs" and "scrawny little arms."

OBAMALICIOUS: Complimentary term used by those who like Obama's looks.

OBAMALOHA: Goodbye, Obama-style, with a nod to Hawaii, his birthplace.

OH-BAMA: Joyful exclamation, via headlines in the Kennebec, Maine, Journal, The Regisister Guard in Eugene, Ore., and The Namibian, from the southern African country of Namibia.

BAMELOT: Description of his presidency, from a New York Post headline that played on the youth and freshness of John F. Kennedy's administration that came to be known as "Camelot."

OBAMERIKA: Headline from the Croatian newspaper Slobodna Dalmacija.

BARACKSTAR: Description from those who believe Obama is "the Mick Jagger of politics" (from Slate.com). telegraph.co.uk


 

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Batman's Big Love Scene

 
 

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Friday, November 14, 2008

The Flat Tax Myth

 

The concept of a flat tax bears some explanation. There are three main types of taxes: the progressive tax, the regressive tax, and the proportional tax. a progressive tax taxes the wealthy more than the poor, a regressive tax taxes the poor more than the wealthy, and a proportional tax uses the same percentage across the board regardless of income.

Many of the taxes you pay today are flat taxes. When you get a drivers license or library card, you pay the same as everybody else. Sales tax is a flat tax.

The idea of a flat tax for federal and state income tax appeals to many conservatives. Almost every year in congress bills are introduced that directly relate to the concept of a flat tax. Steve Forbes ran for president in 1996 on a platform of a 17% flat tax.

In talking about the flat tax it is important to note that there is difference between the flat tax in theory and in the real world. When assessing the validity of any proposed flat tax one must think about the context within which it is being applied, as well as how the author is defining the term "flat tax." With a flat tax, all taxpayers would pay the same rate.

Under a flat tax system for federal and state taxes, paperwork would be largely eliminated as taxes could be filled out on a single sheet of paper, but that there would also be a huge public outcry if the government don't have deductions for charitable contributions, mortgages interest, real estate taxes, etc.

Remember that once you allow anything like deductions for real estate or child support then it is not a flat tax anymore. for example, students that have to pay interest on their tuition loans get a tax credit. If that were removed, students would lose that incentive. But if you left it in, then it would no longer be a flat tax. This would affect many areas, including charities and the disabled.

The popular conception of a flat tax is that it would lower taxes for the wealthiest and raise taxes for the poorest - unless you lowered all taxes to the lowest level, but this would (of course) generate insufficent revenue for the state and federal government.

If the United States were to adopt a proportional tax system, that is to say a tax rate that averages the rates paid by the upper and lower classes, the tax rates for those with lower and higher incomes would have to change in proportion to generate the same income.

Our present tax system is by definition largely progressive, which means that how much you pay in taxes is based on how much you earn.

For example, the average federal tax rate for the bottom 50% of taxpayers in 2003 was 2.95%, while the average federal tax rate for the top 50% of taxpayers was 13.35%.

in a proportional tax system, the tax rate for the top 50% would go down, and the average federal tax rate for the bottom 50% of taxpayers would go up. If the tax rate for the lower percentage of taxpayers goes up, this would give them less available income to spend. The top 50% would have a larger percentage of their available income to spend.

The subject is actually far more complex than the scope of this small article, but there are economists that say as a nation, we are already paying a flat tax. According to an article in the New York Times, the different effects of payroll, state and local taxes the tax burden is probably the same or higher on the poor than the rich.

An article in Slate magazine, Tax Rates Are Already Flat, digests some of the material in the New York Times and states: "the Times has provided a more precise accounting that shows that those in the bottom quintile (people earning on average $7,946) pay almost exactly the same percentage of their income in taxes as people in the top quintile (people earning on average $116,666). The bottom fifth pays 18 percent, the top fifth pays 19 percent, and the three groups in between pay between 14 percent and 17 percent—which is to say, roughly the same. Obviously there's some individual variation, but on average Americans pay approximately 17 percent of their income in taxes, no matter what income they earn."



This would indicate that if you are an American citizen and all of the factors are considered, you are already paying a flat tax. The concept of a progressive tax in the United States is something of a myth.
 

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The Philanthropist

 
The Philanthropist
 

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Hindsight

 
This Is What the 2008 Electoral Map Would Look Like if the Election Were Decided by [Fill In the Blank]
 

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You Too Can be a Flaming Carrot!

 
 

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008

With the Help of the Mainstream Media, Sarah Palin Manages to Land on Her Feet

 
Holy reset button, Batman! Am I the only one that has noticed that the mainstream media has graciously fitted Sarah Palin's post-election landing with scrutiny-free protective pillow pants?
 

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Sarah Palin Continues to Excite Her Party

 
speaking of Sarah Palin landing on her feet, I missed this little gem completely...


The manufacturer reccomends that for best results, this product should be filled filled with plenty of hot air!

I guess there must be a market for this sort of thing...
 

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Happy Birthday, FranIAm!

 
 

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