Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Friday, January 14, 2011

Second Amendment Solutions Solve Nothing

 

I don't think that you can blame the recent tragedy in Arizona directly on the violent and hateful rhetoric that has been generated by the the right. I also don't think that said rhetoric is above scrutiny and criticism. The violence that we have seen lately is not happening in a vacuum.

July 2008: A gunman named Jim David Adkisson, agitated at how "liberals" are "destroying America," walks into a Unitarian Church and opens fire, killing two churchgoers and wounding four others.

October 2008: Two neo-Nazis are arrested in Tennessee in a plot to murder dozens of African-Americans, culminating in the assassination of President Obama.

December 2008: A pair of "Patriot" movement radicals -- the father-son team of Bruce and Joshua Turnidge, who wanted "to attack the political infrastructure" -- threaten a bank in Woodburn, Oregon, with a bomb in the hopes of extorting money that would end their financial difficulties, for which they blamed the government. Instead, the bomb goes off and kills two police officers. The men eventually are convicted and sentenced to death for the crime.

December 2008: In Belfast, Maine, police discover the makings of a nuclear "dirty bomb" in the basement of a white supremacist shot dead by his wife. The man, who was independently wealthy, reportedly was agitated about the election of President Obama and was crafting a plan to set off the bomb.

January 2009: A white supremacist named Keith Luke embarks on a killing rampage in Brockton, Mass., raping and wounding a black woman and killing her sister, then killing a homeless man before being captured by police as he is en route to a Jewish community center.

February 2009: A Marine named Kody Brittingham is arrested and charged with plotting to assassinate President Obama. Brittingham also collected white-supremacist material.

April 2009: A white supremacist named Richard Poplawski opens fire on three Pittsburgh police officers who come to his house on a domestic-violence call and kills all three, because he believed President Obama intended to take away the guns of white citizens like himself. Poplawski is currently awaiting trial.

April 2009: Another gunman in Okaloosa County, Florida, similarly fearful of Obama's purported gun-grabbing plans, kills two deputies when they come to arrest him in a domestic-violence matter, then is killed himself in a shootout with police.

May 2009: A "sovereign citizen" named Scott Roeder walks into a church in Wichita, Kansas, and assassinates abortion provider Dr. George Tiller.

June 2009: A Holocaust denier and right-wing tax protester named James Von Brunn opens fire at the Holocaust Museum, killing a security guard.

February 2010: An angry tax protester named Joseph Ray Stack flies an airplane into the building housing IRS offices in Austin, Texas. (Media are reluctant to label this one "domestic terrorism" too.)

March 2010: Seven militiamen from the Hutaree Militia in Michigan and Ohio are arrested and charged with plotting to assassinate local police officers with the intent of sparking a new civil war.

March 2010: An anti-government extremist named John Patrick Bedell walks into the Pentagon and opens fire, wounding two officers before he is himself shot dead.

May 2010: A "sovereign citizen" from Georgia is arrested in Tennessee and charged with plotting the violent takeover of a local county courthouse.

May 2010: A still-unidentified white man walks into a Jacksonville, Fla., mosque and sets it afire, simultaneously setting off a pipe bomb.

May 2010: Two "sovereign citizens" named Jerry and Joe Kane gun down two police officers who pull them over for a traffic violation, and then wound two more officers in a shootout in which both of them are eventually killed.

July 2010: An agitated right-winger and convict named Byron Williams loads up on weapons and drives to the Bay Area intent on attacking the offices of the Tides Foundation and the ACLU, but is intercepted by state patrolmen and engages them in a shootout and armed standoff in which two officers and Williams are wounded.

September 2010: A Concord, N.C., man is arrested and charged with plotting to blow up a North Carolina abortion clinic. The man, 26-year--old Justin Carl Moose, referred to himself as the "Christian counterpart to (Osama) bin Laden” in a taped undercover meeting with a federal informant.


 

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Speaker Boehner is Suffering From Gavel Envy

 
I know that the election has been over since November of last year, but I'm still having trouble accepting John Boehner and his giant comedy gavel as a valid Speaker of the House...

Despite the recent election...

Nancy Pelosi will be remembered as one of the most powerful and effective Speakers in U.S. history...

Whereas Speaker Boehner has already made a name for himself in another category. [ 2 ]
 

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Presented Without Comment

 
Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) has been named to the House intelligence committee.
 

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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

My Favorite Tv Shows Of 2010

 
No time for blogging today! My scientific team and I are just finishing up some year-end fembot maintenance. In the meantime you can read about my favorite non-news related TV shows that I watched in 2010 in alphabetical order (most of them are in reruns):

I love watching 30 Rock every week.

Cancelled after three seasons, episodes of the Comedy Central cartoon Drawn Together still airs once in a while. I really like Foxxy Love and Princess Clara, but I think that Ling-Ling steals the show every week! The third season was definitely the best.

I missed the show Friends when it originally aired, so now I enjoy it in reruns.

I really like Futurama and am glad that Comedy Central decided to renew the show. There are supposed to be at least thirteen more episodes that will be broadcast in 2011!

The TV show House is awesome!

I've been watching Scrubs because Dr. Cox and Dr. Kelso are hilarious!

Anything Shatner is always awesome. I really enjoyed Shatner's Raw Nerve [ 2 ] interviews with Leonard Nimoy, Rush Limbaugh and Weird Al Yankovic. Unfortunately many of the show's interviews are with some of Hollywood's not so interesting stars like Whoopie Goldberg, Tim Allen, Henry Winkler, Drew Carey, Jenna Jameson, Kelsey Grammer, John Voight, Jimmy Kimmel, Judge Judy, Jenna Jameson, Valerie Bertinelli and Scott Baio.

I like to watch South Park, although I think that the show's message can be kind of whiney and preachy at times.

Of course my favorite shows are science fiction or horror related, so here are my favorite spooky shows:

I have really really enjoyed all three seasons of the British TV series Being Human. I especially like Sinead Keenan who plays the nurse/werewolf Nina. The show is so good that the Sci-Fi channel SyFy channel is making an American version that is bound to be really crappy by comparison to the original show.

I like to watch Elvira because she plays the really awful horror films that I crave. She is the last of a dying breed of cheesy horror film hosts. (I really miss Bob Wilkins.)

Although I don't like the beginning credits for Masters of Horror, it's one of my favorite shows ever. My favorite episode is Deer Woman [ 2 ]. Other episodes that are also worth mentioning are Homecoming, Family and Jenifer.

One of my favorite shows is Monsters because they always have some kind of monster in every episode. One of my favorite episodes is Micro Minds [ 1, 2 ] because the giant amoeba special effects are so hilarious.

I kind of like the show, Night Visions, although I found the host of the show, Henry Rollins, really annoying. There were only 13 episodes of the show. I especially like the episode "Bokor", but that is mostly because I have a crush on actress that was in it, Samantha Mathis. [ 2, 3 ]

I have been watching episodes from both of the different revivals of Rod Serling's original series, The Twilight Zone, the 1985 version and the 2002 version. By the way, the Sci-Fi channel SyFy channel is running a marathon of the original Twilight Zone on December 31st.

Tales from the Crypt is pretty awesome. I think that the Crypt Keeper should eat a few more between meal snacks, however.

I have ben watching the awesome TV show Tales From the Darkside. My favorite episode is definitely Seasons of Belief [ 1, 2 ], which is about a monster called the Grither.

And there you have it, my favorite shows of 2010!
 

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Friday, December 24, 2010

The "Tax Cuts for the Rich" Snowman

 
Despite the inability of congress to pass the budget... they did manage to pass START and aid for 9/11 First Responders, and the "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy was finally repealed...

But I'm still upset about the "Tax Cuts for the Rich" snowman.
 

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Merry Christmas, Everyone!

 
Yuletide greetings, everyone!

I have a special christmas recipe for you...

Handed down by the Great Lawgiver, who brought presents to all of the good apes and gave lobotomies to all of those pesky humans. Here is his divine simian recipe:

Milk Punch ala the Great Lawgiver
Fill the blender 3/4 full of ice
fill the blender 3/4 full of milk
2 capfulls of vanilla (1/2 teaspoon)
4 heaping tablespoons of sugar
Mix in 3 shots of brandy
Sprinkle Nutmeg on top of each serving.

Merry Christmas, everyone!
 

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Monday, December 13, 2010

Sparky the Wonder Kitty

 
I would like to congratulate my good friend Dr. Derkington (AKA DerkTheJerk) on his discerning nature and impeccable good taste in cats. He has recently acquired a new cat by the name of Sparky, whose mischievous nature and affable personality makes him an immediate candidate for for the cat-e-gory of Awesome Catness of the First Order.

Sparky takes his job of housecat quite seriously, and is never one to shirk from his many feline responsibilities...

All day long Sparky works tirelessly to fulfill his many domestic duties...

Oh. look... He's sleeping!
 

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Vintage Drive-In Intermission Films

 
No time for blogging today! Germaine Gregarious and I are too busy enjoying a meal of pizza, tortelloni and risotto on the sunny shores of Venice. (Pity, but the filetti di orata al cartoccio was a bit off due to seasonal foreign intrigue.) In the meantime you can watch this swell video of vintage drive-in intermission films. (Oh, dear! That last bullet hit me right in the gondola!)
 

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Friday, December 10, 2010

President Obama Isn't Hitler, He's Neville Chamberlain!

 
OK, it's official. The president is an idiot. The Democratic Party sucks.

We must all prepare for...


 

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Haliburton to Bribe the Nigerian Government out of Dick Cheney's Bribery Charges

 

Halliburton is attempting to pay $500 million to the Nigerian government to settle bribery charges that could keep the company's former CEO Dick Cheney out of prison, that is to say that Haliburton is trying to bribe the Nigerian government out of Dick Cheney's bribery charges.

The fact that Halliburton appears to be attempting an out-of-court settlement puzzles some analysts, who note that criminal courts don’t normally allow monetary settlements, leading some to believe that "Halliburton and the other accused companies are attempting to bribe their way out of a bribery prosecution," rawstory.com reports. chattahbox.com

If nothing else, this proves that Nigeria's court system has a stronger grasp of reality than it's American counterpart.


 

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Let Them Eat Toast!

 


"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"
Steven Wright
 

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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

I Said It Before - Now is Not the Time for Tears...

 
After the recent disapointment of the midterm election, Democrats are naturally upset at the consequences.


But the despite the carnage...


I say that now is not the time for tears...


Now is the time to kick ass and take names in 2012.
 

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We Won't Have Christine O'Donnell To Kick Around Anymore...

 
Despite the Democratic losses in the recent election...


I still regret that Christine O'Donnell is gone.
 

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"I love acting. It is so much more real than life." Oscar Wilde

 
Expressing frustration with the media scrutiny over his company's massive oil spill, former BP CEO Tony Hayward said that he might have been better served by having a degree in acting rather than by his degree in geology.
 

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Sunday, October 03, 2010

Never Play Cat and Mouse If You're a Mouse

 
The media has been quick to criticize Christine O'Donnell recent comments...

But there might be a grain of truth in what she says.
 

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Thursday, September 23, 2010

The Girl Scout Guide to Islamo-Fascist Lesbian Sex (With Pictures!)

All Girl Man-Hating Club Full of Pro-Abortion Lesbians and Atheists! 1. Junior Lesbian Tab 2. Islamo-Fascist Trefoil Pin 3. Atheist Agenda Pin 4. Pro-Abortion Pin 5. Mustard Stain 6A. Gynocological Girltopia Pin 6B. Oral Sex Insignia 6C. Radical Feminist Agenda Pin 6D. Sign of the NYTimes<br />7. Communist Cookie Sale Pin 8. We Don't Need no Stinkin'... 9. Indoctrinate the Innocent Pin 10. Multi-Orgasmic Satisfaction Pin 11. AIDS For Everybody Medallion 12. Homoerotic Sappho Rainbow 13. Rusty Syringe Pin 14. Overies Only Badge 15. feminism or Death Ribbon 16. All Girl Man-Hating Club Pin 17. All Hail Satan! 18. Pagan Belief-System Pin 19. Lascivious Lesbian Pin 20. Estrogenia Council Badge


I recently took out out a rather large personal home improvement cookie loan because my good friend BAC over at Yikes! sent me a link that promised that "Girl Scouts are selling you lesbian, baby-killing feminist militia cookies."


Imagine my joy when I heard that Girl Scout were guilty of crimes involving issues of moral turpitude and loose values. I found that Girl Scout Cookies all all the more delicious upon finding that their rich, creamy goodness is actually filled with rich, creamy badness!

I was quite enjoying my rather large purchase of lesbian Girl Scout Cookies now that I know that Girl Scouts are hellbent on destroying American values, I must say. (Especially the Thin Mints and the Tagalongs. Mmm! Delicious islamo-fascist, pro-abortion goodness!)

My Anti-Jesus Pagan Girl Scout Cookies are helping me to watch my waistline as well, because everyone knows that cookies that are bought for a noble cause have no calories. Also, I am helping to fight Global Warming! (Girl Scouts are green, you know.)

Girl Scouts exposed: Lessons in lesbianism

I was sure that the story was true, because the Googly-Moogly had over 78,900 links that supported the story. Yay! Girl Scouts are man-hating pro-abortion lesbo-atheists! [ 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, etc. ]


And then my world came crumbling down around me like a mint-flavored chocolate wafer lightly dipped in chocolate. (Thin mints are my favorite!)

Much to my chagrin, I found out that the whole story is a fabrication perpetrated by Patti Garibay, the Executive Director of American Heritage Girls, Inc. This organization is a rival scouting program for girls, a "Christ-centered character development program dedicated to the mission of building women of integrity through service to God".


The story was further propagated by James Dobson and the Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute (C-FAM). [ 1, 2 ] Mr. Dobson is something of a colorful character in his own right. [ 1 2, 3 ]


At this point my running mate, Germaine Gregarious, and I decided to investigate...


If you go to the main page of the American Heritage Girls website they have a Flash element that displays several different blurbs and images that hawk different things, including a blurb about the American Heritage Girls being featured on James Dobson's new radio show...


...But the very first element that is displayed in the Flash element of the American Heritage Girls web page advertises a DVD from a private corporation, bigidea.com...


So it would seem that Patti Garibay and the leaders of the American Heritage Girls are promoting the use of giant vegetables to their charges in order to bolster the rather laudable idea that true beauty is within:

New Partnerships Formed, Share Common Message On "True Beauty"
Through VeggieTales new DVD, Sweetpea Beauty. Now girls will have the opportunity to earn a Sweetpea True Beauty activity patch by completing projects on the "True Beauty Guide" made available on bigidea.com and ahgonline.org.

Big Idea is partnering with American Heritage Girls, a nonprofit organization dedicated to the mission of building women of integrity through service to God, family, community and country. Now girls will have the opportunity to earn a Sweetpea True Beauty activity patch by completing projects on the "True Beauty Guide" made available on bigidea.com and ahgonline.org.

To earn this merit badge (that is apparently chock full of self-esteem) the young American Heritage Girl must host a True Beauty Princess Party. It turns out that gaining self-esteem involves playing dress-up, wearing tiaras, candy and Tea Parties:

Sweetpea Beauty resources are wonderful tools for helping your girls earn their Daughter of the King Badge, and a fun Sweetpea True Beauty activity patch too! Here are some ideas for incorporating True Beauty with your Troop!

Host a True Beauty Princess Party or Sleepover

Order a Sweetpea event kit from Big Idea and show the Sweetpea Beauty DVD to the group.

Create a princess theme – everything pink, play dress-up, serve refreshments in teacups, offer sweets, and decorate tiaras as a craft project.

Review the True Beauty guide with the group and consider the project ideas below to support the lessons on the guide. Choose one or more for the group to do together at the Princess Party.

Include older girls in the planning process – they can mentor the younger "princesses" and earn their Daughter of the King badge as well.

What is interesting to note is not so much that the American Heritage Girls were blatantly promoting a corporate vegetable based product to their young girls, but that they have actually made these products part of the American Heritage Girls curriculum. According to their website, parents of American Heritage Girls must buy various products so that their daughters can earn a merit badge about self-esteem:

Now girls will have the opportunity to earn a Sweetpea True Beauty activity patch by completing projects on the "True Beauty Guide" made available on www.bigidea.com and www.ahgonline.org.

How to Earn a Sweet Pea Beauty Patch with your Troop

Step 1: Visit www.bigidea.com to order your copy of Sweetpea Beauty
(information on this just-for-girls show can be found below)

Step 2: Download the "True Beauty Guide" and the exclusive "AHG Beauty Guide"

Step 3: Plan a special event, such as a Princess Sleepover to complete patch requirements (this patch is a great complement to the Daughter of the King Badge, and an event can easily incorporate both!)

Step 4: Once complete, visit www.bigidea.com to order your Troop's Sweetpea Beauty Patch (available for pre-order now with shipments sent beginning October 2010)


A merit badge about self-esteem is only a few credit card purchases away!

See the Daughter of the King badge ideas for more creative ways to teach these lessons to your Troop!

True Beauty support items available at www.bigidea.com:

Sweetpea Beauty event kit
(DVD, guide, posters, stickers, balloons, etc)
Sweetpea Beauty DVD
Sweetpea Beauty Songs for Girls CD
Sweetpea Beauty digital watch, t-shirt, and posters
365 Bedtime Devotions for Girls
Sweetpea Patch

Some of the products that the American Heritage Girls website wants the parents of American Heritage Girls to buy to boost their self-esteem are: Sweetpea Beauty Veggietales DVD ($14.99), Sweetpea Beauty Songs for Girls CD Sweetpea Beauty Shirt, Pink ($9.99), VeggieTales: SweetPea Beauty 100-pc Puzzle ($5.99), Sweetpea Beauty VeggieTales Wrist Watch ($4.39), Sweetpea Beauty Show Poster ($12.99), Sweetpea Extra Event Advertising Poster ($4.99), Sweetpea Balloons ($7.99), Sweetpea Beauty VeggieTales Backpack US ($19.95), Sweetpea Beauty Church Kit ($19.99), Sweetpea Beauty Sticker Roll ($7.99), Sweetpea Beauty Pink T-Shirt ($11.99), Sweetpea Beauty Dinnerware Set ($12.99) Extra Sweetpea Beauty Event Disc ($14.99), Sweetpea Beauty Plush Toy ($14.99), Prince Larry Plush ($14.99), Jibbitz Sweetpea Charm ($2.99) and of course the actual Sweetpea True Beauty activity patch itself, the Sweetpea Iron-On Woven Patch ($3.99).

And what is the message of this magical tale that the American Heritage Girls says will improve a young girls appraisal of her own worth?


Once upon a time, there lived a royally sour blueberry, a fair rhubarb maiden and a dastardly deceptive mirror! Sweetpea Beauty knows that what's on the inside is what matters most, but insecure Queen Blueberry can't see past her own reflection! So, when a decree is handed down that only the most beautiful can rule the land, the Queen gets nervous and things turn ugly! Banished to the dark forest, Sweetpea's fate seems bleak until a charming prince, a band of merry minstrels and seven snow peas come to the rescue! Will Sweetpea and her friends be able to warn the Queen in time to save her from the clutches of the tricky mirror – or will the crumbling kingdom and the Queen's own heart be lost forever? Find out in this fairy "Veggie" tale about the real meaning of true beauty. [ 1, 2, 3 ]

As near as I can tell, the moral of this tale is that a girl should not really feel capable of handling her own problems, and should instead wait until a charming cucumber arrives to solve all of her problems for her.

This rather ridiculous scenario is particularly disturbing in the light of the fact that both Veggietales and the American Heritage Girls are putting forth this message under the guise that this message is what Jesus wants young girls to feel about themselves. It also seems a bit odd that part of this "Jesus inspired" self-esteem narrative involves spending lots of money.

I am sickened by the thought of Patti Garibay and the leaders of the American Heritage Girls using James Dobson and the Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute to besmirch the good name of the Girl Scouts of America and Jesus in order to promote their own corporate agenda. This is especially galling because no one is paying the same amount of attention to the Patti Garibay and her lies, manipulation and complete lack of cookies.

And this bit is kind of odd: The Executive Director at American Heritage Girls, Inc., Patti Garibay, was involved in a lawsuit [ 2 ] against Lightborne Publishing, Inc. for insinuating in print that a bar called the Smokin' Monkey was a hangout for "skanks and thugs". A judge has dismissed the defamation lawsuit. (Lightborne Publishing, Inc. v. Citizens for Community Values et al.) [ 2, 3 ]

So Patti Garibay was once involved in a defamation lawsuit to defend a bar called the Smokin' Monkey from what she considered to be overly strong language from a newspaper, but feels no remorse about falsely accusing the Girl Scouts of America of distributing a Planned Parenthood sex guide at a UN Meeting and teaching young girls about Pagan stone labyrinths, world peace, global warming, yoga, avatars, smudging incense, Zen gardens and feminism, communism and lesbianism? [ 1 ] (Wait a minute..."world peace"?)

As I mentioned above, the number of websites that is doing a Team Xerox about this false story is astounding. You can find a few lone voices of dissent, but they are few and far between:

(I think that the article that the author is referring to is this one.)

Fear Mongering Malarkey
Posted by rockingjamboree on May 18, 2009 11:35

Reading a quote from Buddha, doing a maze, or seeing Billy Jean King's name on a list of prominent women will not turn my daughter into a Gay Buddhist Communist! My daughter's faith, character and sense of self are stronger than that.

If MAZES are somehow Anti-Christian, why aren't Christian Groups protesting the Denny's Kid's Menu? This article is malarkey.

Promoting diversity is not Anti-Christian or Anti-American!

Gee, why would someone who is trying to start a Girl's Club in direct competition with GSA Cherry Pick through GSA literature in order to come up with some paranoid conspiracy theory of Anti-Christian Deviancy? Patti Garibay obviously has an agenda that she is trying to promote. Why is WND so blatantly promoting Patti Garibay?

I just attended my daughter's Bridging Ceremony into Junior Scouts. She carried the Flag. She recited the Pledge of Allegiance. It was a beautiful, Patriotic experience. My daughter has learned a lot about charity, honesty and yes, Patriotism from the GSA. WND and Patti Garibay's attempt to sully that with innuendo and fear is insulting.



This whole thing is getting out of hand, I say. Who will defend the Girl Scouts of America and their mission to destroy all that we hold sacred?


as anyone that has followed my presidential campaign knows, I like cake, ice cream and cookies, but I don't like vegetables. Please tell all of your friends about this injustice that is be perpetrated by Patti Garibay and the leaders of the American Heritage Girls to besmirch the good name of the Girl Scouts of America.

Don't just do it for the Girl Scouts...

Do it for the cookies!

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