Minister of Science and Chief Protector of the Faith

Friday, February 26, 2010

The Junior Woodchucks Are Working Overtime In South Dakota


The Junior Woodchucks are working overtime in South Dakota, where the state government has just passed a bill telling schools to present the threats of global warming in a skeptical fashion:

The resolution invokes these fallacious claims in the service of four points: "That global warming is a scientific theory rather than a proven fact"; "That there are a variety of climatological, meteorological, astrological, thermological, cosmological, and ecological dynamics that can >> effect << [sic] world weather phenomena and that the significance and interrelativity [sic] of these factors is largely speculative"; "That the debate on global warming has subsumed political and philosophical viewpoints which have complicated and prejudiced the scientific investigation of global warming phenomena"; and that instruction about global warming should be "appropriate to the age and academic development of the student and to the prevailing classroom circumstances." [ 1, 2, 3 ]

I find this rather casual disregard for good grammar quite disturbing. Generally speaking, affect means "to influence," and effect means "a result" [ 4 ].

For example, you can say, "Global warming has affected the rhetoric of many politicians who are bought and paid for by corporate lobbyists", as opposed to "The effect of global warming on corporate lobbyists is to inspire them to give lots of money to members of congress".

Please people, there is no excuse for bad grammer.

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The Obama Administration is Coddling Aquatic Detainees

Congressional Republicans are outraged because the Obama administration has mirandized Tilikum the killer whale. They feel that the practice of reading aquatic detainees their rights should be eschewed in favor of waterboarding.

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The Spider's Shake Scene From The 1967 Greek Film, "Ksipolitos Prigips".

No time for blogging today! I'm busy arranging tax breaks for corporations so that they can ship American jobs overseas! (Just say no to American socialism - except for corporate welfare, of course.) In the meantime you can watch this swell video of the The Spider's Shake scene from the 1967 Greek film, "Ksipolitos Prigips". (As much as I like this video, I can only say that I deeply regret that the actress is not wearing go go boots.)


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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

The "Tarantino"

As pointed out on the Rachel Maddow Show [ 1, 2 ], House Minority Leader John Boehner was shocked by the huge size of the Health Reform Bill...

But he also objects to the size of the President's additional health reform proposal...

Clearly he has something particular in mind...

The "Tarantino".

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Will Ferrell singing "Whole Wide World" From the Film Stranger Than Fiction

No time for blogging today! I'm still nursing a wicked case of the flu. (I must be on the road to recovery - My doctor says that my diagnostic readings are off the chart!) In the meantime you can watch this swell video of Will Ferrell singing the song, "Whole Wide World" from the film Stranger Than Fiction. (Please, ladies - No more jello! I want chocolate cake!)


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Gung Hoy Fa Choy!

Chinese New Year!

It's the year of the Tiger...

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The US Olympic Hockey Team beats Canada!


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Thursday, February 18, 2010

The Horrors of Giant Mutant Rodents

I am quite disappointed in President Obama's recent announcement of a conditional $8.3 billion loan guarantee to build the first new nuclear power plant in the United States in 27 years. [ 1, 2 ]

Nuclear energy is not even that cheap - according to Wikipedia: "The lifetime cost of new generating capacity in the United States was estimated in 2006 by the U.S. government: wind cost was estimated at $55.80 per MWh, coal at $53.10, natural gas at $52.50 and nuclear at $59.30. However, the 'total overnight cost' for new nuclear was assumed to be $1,984 per kWe — as seen above in Capital Costs, this figure is subject to debate, as much higher cost was found for recent projects. Also, carbon taxes and backup power costs were not considered." [ 3, 4 ]

And therein lies a crucial part of the rub: According to a study done by the Congressional Budget Office, a carbon tax of $45 per metric ton would probably make nuclear power cost competitive when compared to conventional fossil fuel for electricity generation. [ 5 ] So Cap and Trade actually makes nuclear power seem seem more like a viable solution, if you fudge the number the right way.

It's really kind of silly to even compare costs of nuclear power to any other fuel source. There are numerous graphs and charts that support both the pro and the con of nuclear energy, but an honest accounting of the numbers will always show that nuclear power is only possible through huge sums of money being provided by government subsidy. No bank or industry will even consider investing in nuclear energy without government subsidies. All of the charts and graphs that promote nuclear power and attempt to show it's potential profitability never take into account the necessary government subsidies. The nuclear power industry is just another blatant example of corporate socialism.

What is also never brought up in discussions about nuclear power is the cost of housing deadly radioactive nuclear waste safely for the next 10,000 to 1,000,000 years (depending on the kind of material). Nobody has ever come up with a viable solution to this problem. This rarely discussed cost never quite seems to make it into any equation regarding the overall cost of nuclear power. [ 6 ]

There are no feasible solutions for long term storage of radioactive waste as of yet, and in my opinion there is an unacceptable potential for catastrophic accidents that turn people into zombie mutant teabaggers with three heads, turn our food supply into something even less edible than junk food, and sterilize (if not kill) humans and animals alike... Not to mention the horrors of giant mutant rodents.

It can be said that the waste from fossil fuel causes more deaths than nuclear waste. The World Nuclear Association provides a comparison of deaths due to accidents among different forms of energy production. In their comparison, "deaths per terawatt-year (TWyr) of electricity produced from 1970 to 1992 are quoted as 885 for hydropower, 342 for coal, 85 for natural gas, and 8 for nuclear". [ 7 ] But that doesn't take into account the possible deaths that nuclear waste may cause over the next few thousand generations.

I think it bears repeating - mankind has no idea how to safely contain lethal radioactive nuclear waste that will continue to be deadly to life on the planet for the next 10,000 to 1,000,000 years, depending on the kind of material.

The entire span of mankind's recorded history is only roughly 6000 years, so mankind is creating waste that have to housed in some fashion for longer than humans have had the written word. That's a really, really long time. I can't even commit to a subscription to Netflix.

This is a far more irresponsible position than leaving a huge national debt to future generations. We are using a deadly technology that will create poisonous waste that mankind will have to babysit for thousands of years merely to create energy that will only be used for a short time. Future generations will see no benefit from these nuclear power stations, with the possible exception of some cool science fiction movies made about possible nuclear mishaps.

In the end, President Obama's loan guarantee for a new nuclear power plant won't really change the already existing problems regarding nuclear waste. We are still going to have to find a way to house the waste that has already been created in this country and the rest of the world, and the threat of nuclear weapons is actually still far more frightening.

We are already too late to undo the many complications caused by nuclear power, it's already here - and solutions will have to be found to solve the present and future problems caused by nuclear power no matter what. It's not going to go away. [ 8 ]

The only good thing that might come from all of this is that this new nuclear power station is already over budget, while there are new advances in renewable sources of energy lower their cost every day. [ 8 ] The looming reality of a new nuclear power station will force the debate to take a harder look at the numbers.

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Prepare for the future with Vault-Tec!

No time for blogging today! Geramaine Gregarious and the girls of the LGPPP are throwing a party - and they are serving hordourves! (Am I lucky or what!?!) In the meantime you a can watch this swell trailer of the video game "Fallout 3". (Caution! NSFW!) Prepare for the future with Vault-Tec! (I actually only like the first part of the video. I don't like the violence at the end, but the begining of the video has valuable underground dwelling tips to help you survive the upcoming nuclear holocaust... And a really cool robot!)


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Happy Birthday to the Stimulus

Happy Birthday to the Stimulus

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The Medicinal Properties of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

Don't be silly, Dr. Zaius - Not all of my patient's are as annoying as you. A lot of my patients are dead!
I'm sorry that I have not been around much lately, I'm still really sick. I am back at work however, thanks to the antibiotic doxycycline, lots of antihistamines and the medicinal properties of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups!


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Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Modeling For Haiti Relief

Am I the only one that finds this odd? I really don't know anything about Naomi Campbell, and from what I could gather from Don Lemon's CNN interview with her she seemed genuinely concerned about the children in Haiti, but I felt that there was something jarring about watching a news story about "Modeling For Haiti Relief".

All of the images were of either Naomi Campbell or of models on a runway wearing clothes that would later be sold for Haiti Relief.


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Charlie Brooker's "How To Report The News"

No time for blogging today! I am busy speaking at the local Ladies Home Auxiliary. (I felt compelled by a strong sense of duty and patriotism to accept their invitation. Also, I was told that they would serving dessert!) In the meantime, you can watch this swell video by Charlie Brooker, "How To Report The News". (I couldn't possibly decide between the chocolate cake and the banana cream pie. I think it would be best if I had a slice of each!)

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Evan Bayh pulls a Palin

Yeah, well he was kind of dickhead anyway.

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Sunday, February 14, 2010

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day!

...I hope that someone special has stolen your heart.

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The Candies

No time for blogging today! I've busy settling a minor differerence of opinion between two dear friends. (Jeepers! If this continues, we might miss the first seating for the brunch buffet!) In the meantime you can listen to this delightful love song by The Candies (Ran Ito, Yoshiko Tanaka and Miki Fujimura). (Nihonn go wo renshu suru hitsuyou ga arimasu!)

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Today is Freida Bee's Birthday!



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Thursday, February 11, 2010

Sarah Palin's New Secret Weapon...

Much is being said about Sarah Palin's speech at the National Tea Party convention.

While elitists in the media are making jokes at Sarah Palin's expense over some special Tea Party notes that were written on her hand, real god-loving Americans find her reminders to herself very human and quite endearing.

The Obama Socialists and the Mainstream Media will be bowled over by Sarah Palin's new secret weapon...

The Tea Party Cootie Catcher!

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The Trailer to the 1973 Film "Superchick"

No time for blogging today! I have been sick for the last two weeks, so I am busy swimming in a limpid pool of antihistamines, antibiotics, cough medicine, Pepto Bismol and chicken soup. (My doctor is true a magician. Every time I see him, money disappears from my wallet!) In the meantime you can watch this swell trailer to the 1973 film "Superchick". ('A swinging super motion picture experience about a super kind of woman!')


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Do These Glasses Make My "Cheeks" Look Big?

The 'Blog' of 'Unnecessary' Quotation Marks
This is an actual photo that I took of a sign that I saw from a pizza parlor. I have no idea what it is that the sign is trying to say. I have submitted the photo to the proper authorties.

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Thursday, February 04, 2010

"Sarah Palin: Faith, Family, Freedom - Can She Save America?"

On sale now: "Sarah Palin: Faith, Family, Freedom - Can She Save America?" [ 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ]

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Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Squawking Popinjays, Pithecanthropic Mountebanks and Miserable Molecules of Mildew


You can't even make jokes about stuff like this. It defies description, begs disbelief and staggers the imagination. Daily Kos/Research 2000 Poll Daily Kos Poll Validates Republican Stereotypes Poll shows most GOP voters actually caricatures of GOP voters Kos GOP Poll: 39% believe Obama should be impeached Poll: What Republicans believe (good comments)

"The survey found that 63 percent of those surveyed believe that the president is a socialist, 36 percent don't think he was born in this country and 22 percent aren't sure."

"If there is any solace for the president, it could be that only just over 20 percent of Republicans believe he wants the terrorists to win."


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Palin's PAC Purchases Plenty of Palin Books


Sarah Palin spent more of her Sarah PAC donations on copies of her own book than she gave to political candidates. According to recent FEC reports reports filed by Palin’s PAC, more than $63,000 was spent on purchasing copies of her memoir "Going Rogue," while donating just $43K to federal candidates. Palin Uses PAC Money to Buy $63,000 Worth of Own Books Sarah Palin's book-buying scandal What the Palin PAC's Book Binge Really Means Michele Bachmann gets campaign donation from Sarah Palin Palin's PAC Buys Lots of Palin Books

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A Matter of Opinion

My good friend DerkTheJerk says that two screens are always better than one, Which I can agree with in principal...

but I feel that his assertion overlooks what should be the correct emphasis.

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I Live in Constant Fear of Killer Robots From the Future

As the president of the NRA once said to me during a future archeological vacation on the beaches of the Forbidden Zone, "Would an ape make a human doll - That TALKS?" [ 2 ]


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Star Wars Mos Eisley Re-Edit

No time for blogging today! I'm busy negotiating away some tax cuts for the rich with the local investment bankers yacht club. (You might think that this yachting situation looks pretty scary, but you should see the local golf course!) In the meantime you can watch this swell NSFW video of a Star Wars Mos Eisley Re-Edit. (I actually disagree with this video to a degree. Mos Eisley is really not so bad, once you figure out where they serve donuts!)


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